IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that countries should limit the amount of food that they import and mainly eat products from their own country. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #countries #limit #amount #food #import #products #country
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In recent times many
countries
Use synonyms
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 been depending on
Use synonyms
import
Wrong verb form
importing
show examples
 and
export
Wrong verb form
exporting
show examples
goods
Use synonyms
. It is a highly debatable issue whether
countries
Use synonyms
 should avoid the amount of
food
Use synonyms
tha
Correct your spelling
that
 they
import
Use synonyms
 , or whether they mainly eat products from their own
country
Use synonyms
. I totally agree that it is useful to
import
Use synonyms
goods
Use synonyms
 from other
countries
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 essay will outline the importance of importing foods and not only mainly depending on our
country
Use synonyms
's
food
Use synonyms
. Importing
goods
Use synonyms
play
Correct subject-verb agreement
plays
show examples
 a vital role in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
employment. There will be a wide range of factories that require a large number of workers and employees.
For example
Linking Words
, my
auncle
Correct your spelling
uncle
 works in
international
Correct article usage
an international
show examples
 factor which is famous
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
buing
Correct your spelling
buying
being
 various types of
vegatable
Correct your spelling
vegetable
vegetables
 from different
countries
Use synonyms
. So,
this
Linking Words
 may help
people
Use synonyms
 to find
opprtunities
Correct your spelling
opportunities
 for
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, engaging in
Use synonyms
import
Wrong verb form
importing
show examples
goods
Use synonyms
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 potentially can lead to
Correct article usage
a varity
show examples
varity
Correct your spelling
variety
 of
food
Use synonyms
.
People
Use synonyms
 have many choices in choosing the best product.
For instance
Linking Words
, if you go to the the Lulu hypermarket , there will be many international
fruit
Change to a plural noun
fruits
show examples
 which are from different
Use synonyms
country
Change the noun form
countries
show examples
 like India or America.
Thus
Linking Words
,
poeple
Correct your spelling
people
 will enjoy eating from
diffrernt
Correct your spelling
different
Use synonyms
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
.
In addition
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
import
Wrong verb form
importing
show examples
 products usually
strenghening
Correct your spelling
strengthening
 social relationships. It encourages
coopreation
Correct your spelling
cooperation
 and social interaction between individuals and communities. A good example here is the
reslut
Correct your spelling
result
 of conducted
reseach
Correct your spelling
research
 at Glasgow University illustrates that the movement of trade between the
countries
Use synonyms
 increased dramatically to 90%.
As a result
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 could
helps
Change the verb form
help
show examples
 to build
a good relationships
Correct the article-noun agreement
a good relationship
good relationships
show examples
 between
people
Use synonyms
 and communities.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the economy of the
country
Use synonyms
contribute
Change the verb form
contributes
show examples
 to
climb
Correct article usage
the climb
show examples
 in our
country
Use synonyms
. A lot of
people
Use synonyms
 like to buy
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
new and fresh
Use synonyms
import's
Change noun form
import
show examples
food
Use synonyms
. To illustrate,
people
Use synonyms
 prefer to go shopping where there are
huge
Change the article
a huge
the huge
show examples
 number of
goods
Use synonyms
. In conclusion,
Use synonyms
import
Replace the word
imported
show examples
 foods are helpful for
people
Use synonyms
. I agree that it is
essntial
Correct your spelling
essential
 for both
countries
Use synonyms
 and individuals to buy from other
countries
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, the government should
stoppe
Correct your spelling
stop
 the
iead
Correct your spelling
idea
 of limiting the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
import
Replace the word
imported
show examples
 products.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 should be
encourge
Correct your spelling
encouraged
encourage
 to work hard and trade for
best
Add an article
the best
show examples
 product.
Submitted by 13570581 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure all parts of the task are fully addressed and developed with relevant ideas and examples. You mentioned important points about employment and the economy, but the essay could benefit from more balance by also discussing potential drawbacks or the perspective of those who disagree.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure by clearly presenting and organizing main ideas. Some ideas could be better linked and expanded upon. For example, the connection between variety of foods and enjoying different cultures could be more clearly stated.
coherence cohesion
Provide a more comprehensive conclusion that summarises all main points with a clear final opinion or recommendation.
task achievement
You offer clear and relevant examples which support your main points, like the example of your uncle working in the import business.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction clearly presents your opinion and outlines the points to be discussed.
coherence cohesion
The essay discusses multiple perspectives, such as the roles of employment and social relationships in importation.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • domestically produced food
  • agricultural sector
  • carbon footprint
  • greenhouse gas emissions
  • food security
  • global market fluctuations
  • trade disputes
  • local food production
  • dietary variety
  • international trade relations
  • retaliation
  • exports
What to do next:
Look at other essays: