In the opinion of some people, internet has narrowed the gap among people in the world by increasing social interaction. To what extent do you agree/disagree with this view?

#people #internet #gap #world #interaction

Some

people

believe that the

gap

between individuals has become larger

due to

social

interaction

this

modern world. I completely agree with

this

notion

due to

the

internet

makes

people

can interact

Change preposition

with

show examples

each other without being

presence

Replace the word

present

show examples

, and it can be solved by keeping physical

interaction

among them.

Internet

allows

people

easily

Fix the infinitive

to easily

show examples

connect to others through their smartphones. As

communication

can be generated virtually, they do not need to meet each other physically.

For example

, many companies apply a Working From Anywhere (WFA) system and only

held

Wrong verb form

hold

show examples

online meetings via Zoom application these days.

As a result

, even though they work together in the same company, they barely see each other in person.

Furthermore

technology

Replace the word

technological

show examples

advancement leads to the creation of many interesting applications that

takes

Correct subject-verb agreement

take

show examples

people

's attention. Take online games,

for instance

. Children used to play together

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

hide and seek or

Remove the article

apply

show examples

roleplay with their friends,

however

, it is now common to see the children prefer to play a Mobile Legend game

instead

of visiting their friends' homes.

Therefore

, they are glued to their phones all day without any social

interaction

However

gap

Correct article usage

the gap

show examples

issue

that is

generated by the

internet

can be tackled by maintaining physical interactions

Change preposition

with

show examples

others,

such

as planning

holiday

Add an article

a holiday

show examples

together with

friends every summer. That being said, it is important to be aware that the experience offered by direct

communication

is irreplaceable compared to virtual

communication

. In conclusion, the

internet

profound to offer easier

communication

that generates a

gap

between

people

nowadays,

however

, the awareness of

maintain

Wrong verb form

maintaining

show examples

direct

interaction

is needed in order to avoid

larger

Correct article usage

a larger

show examples

gap

Change preposition

show examples

society in the future.

Submitted by chocolate10 on Sun Oct 06 2024

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task achievement

Ensure a balanced discussion by acknowledging any counterarguments or different perspectives in your essay. Consider discussing how the internet might also bridge gaps in certain ways.

task achievement

Develop your main points more thoroughly with additional supporting details or examples.

task achievement

Improve the clarity of your argumentation by making distinct separation between main ideas and supporting details or examples.

coherence cohesion

The essay is well-structured with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion that effectively summarize the main points.

task achievement

Good use of relevant examples, such as working from anywhere and online games, to support the argument.

coherence cohesion

Logical progression of ideas from introduction to conclusion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

270 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In the opinion of some people, internet has narrowed the gap among people in the world by increasing social interaction. To what extent do you agree/disagree with this view?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Many countries offer a free health care system to their citizens rather than relying on private health care. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of having a free system, and give your opinion. Write at least 250 words.

Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Students should pay the full cost for their own study, because university education benefits individuals rather than society. To what extend do you agree or disagree.

ome families send their children to a foreign country to be educated. Discuss both the advantages and disadvantages of this course of action. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.