You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. People believe that they should be able to keep all the money they earn and should not pay tax to the state. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.
It is believed that
tax
taken from income
is not necessary because people
deserve to keep all the money they earn. While
people
may have more savings if they are not obligated to pay taxes, I stand with them
who disagree that Correct pronoun usage
those
people
should keep all of their salary because paying tax
regularly is a mandatory action as a resident in order to develop public services and remove social inequality.
Fix the agreement mistake
taxes
Firstly
, when people
keep all of their income
for themselves, they do not contribute to the development of their country. Tax
is one of the essential source
of the state's Change to a plural noun
sources
income
, in
which Change preposition
apply
usually
allocated to build services for Add a missing verb
is usually
public
Correct article usage
the public
such
as schools, parks, roads, and hospitals. If one country do
not Change the verb form
does
charged
its residents, they may not be able to construct a better public facility. Change the verb form
charge
As a result
, an
accessible facilities for Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
public
, which may enhance their life quality, can not be provided.
Add an article
the public
On the other hand
, the value of income
taken by the state must be charged fairly. The higher the salary, the more amount of money should be charged. Therefore
, a state possible
to create equality amongst its residents because the richer a person, the higher their contribution. Correct your spelling
is able
As
instance, social inequality problems may be avoided by the government.
In conclusion, Change preposition
For
whereas
people
deserves
all the money they get from their job, it is Change the verb form
deserve
also
important for people
to contribute to society by paying taxes. Therefore
, better public facilities can be constructed to enhance people
's quality of life. In addition
, tax
must be taken fairly to endorse social equalitySubmitted by averinasandra on
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Improvement
Your essay provides a clear response to the task, presenting a balanced view on the necessity of taxes. However, make sure to include specific examples to strengthen your argument and illustrate your points more effectively.
Improvement
Improve the fluency and accuracy of your writing by reviewing some minor grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement (e.g., "do not charged" should be "do not charge").
Improvement
Expanding your vocabulary and using more complex sentence structures will help to fully articulate your ideas. Use varied sentence forms and advanced vocabulary to make your essay more engaging.
Strength
Your essay has a clear logical structure, with a solid introduction and conclusion. This allows the reader to easily follow your argument.
Strength
You effectively explain the societal importance of tax and its role in public services and social equality, making a highly relevant point.
Strength
The conclusion provides a succinct summary of the main points you've discussed, reinforcing your overall stance.