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Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #health #alternative #medicines #treatments #doctor #development
In recent years,
instead
 of going to their usual doctor, patients consider alternative medicines and treatments more viable.
While
 there are some benefits, I believe that
this
 is a negative development. Some positive outcomes may facilitate people to try alternative cures. With the
advanced
Replace the word
advancement
show examples
 of technology, many medical knowledge and treatments are widely spread on the Internet.
While
 some of them might be given by authorities, who provide
public
Correct article usage
the public
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an
Change preposition
with an
show examples
 accurate way of
alleviate
Change the form of the verb
alleviating
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 their pain, it may be a useful way to prevent people with health problems
to go
Change preposition
from going
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 to the hospital.
For example
, methods for lessening the stomachache by doing massages on your own can act as an efficient
treatments
Correct the article-noun agreement
treatment
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 rather than
visit
Wrong verb form
visiting
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 the doctor.
Also
, taking medicines that are more accessible,
such
 as
pain killers
Correct your spelling
painkillers
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 can greatly avoid
Add an article
the headache
a headache
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headache
Fix the agreement mistake
headaches
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, which is much
economical
Correct quantifier usage
more economical
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 and time-saving.
However
, negative consequences can lead to the acceleration of illness and
severer
Correct your spelling
severe
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 health problems by not reaching for actual doctors.
First,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
medical-related information online may not always shared by medical experts but
people
Change preposition
by people
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 who
also
 lack suitable medical
expertises
Correct your spelling
expertise
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. By sharing
those
Correct determiner usage
this
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 information on their social media or online
platform
Fix the agreement mistake
platforms
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, they can generate income by selling medicines or medical equipment, which are illegal
as well as
 ineffective.
In addition
, taking pills without the doctor's diagnosis may contribute to over-consumption or
over-reliant
Correct your spelling
over-reliance
show examples
 on drugs, leading to harmful symptoms that can be life-threatening. In conclusion, despite the fact that some beneficial outcomes can be
done
Verb problem
achieved
show examples
 by alternative medical behaviours, negative consequences can worsen
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
health problems without professional medical
helps
Correct subject-verb agreement
help
show examples
.
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coherence cohesion
To improve your coherence and cohesion, ensure each point flows logically to the next. Use transition words more effectively to create a smooth progression of ideas.
task achievement
Enhance your task achievement by providing more varied and specific examples to support your argument. This will strengthen your response and illustrate your points better.
introduction conclusion present
The essay begins with a clear introduction and concludes with a summarizing statement, effectively framing your argument.
complete response
The topic is generally addressed well, with a clear stance on the issue provided at the beginning.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • alternative medicines
  • treatments
  • positive development
  • negative development
  • health problems
  • usual doctor
  • access
  • personalized approach
  • holistic well-being
  • lack of regulation
  • evidence-based research
  • proper medical treatment
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