IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

You recently received a letter from your friend asking for advice about whether to go to college or try to get a job.You think he /she should get a job. *say why he or she would not enjoy going to college *explain why getting a job is a good idea for him or her *suggest types of job that would be suitable for him or her

#friend #advice #college #job #*say #*explain #idea #*suggest
Dear Carolin, Thank you for your recent letter and I can totally understand your confusion about whether to go to college or
choosing
Wrong verb form
choose
show examples
a work.Perhaps it would be a great idea to get a job as you have
lot
Change the article
a lot
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 of responsibilities. I think you might not be enjoying
to go
Change the verb form
going
show examples
 to college because of many reasons.
Firstly
,you need to spend a lot of money
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 study
purpose
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
show examples
,apart from that,it takes
long
Change the article
a long
show examples
 time to complete the course.All in all, it isn't suitable for a person like you. If you find
out
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a job,it'll definitely add more
colours
Fix the agreement mistake
colour
show examples
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 your life.You
cab
Correct your spelling
can
show examples
 easily manage your familial and social needs,especially you can have a satisfactory life. If I were you,I would select jobs in
IT
Correct article usage
the IT
show examples
 field
such
 as profile developers and game designers.It won't be a great deal for you. Take care and
do
Verb problem
apply
show examples
stay in touch. All the best, Paanujah
Submitted by paanu95 on

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Task Achievement
Include more specific reasons and examples for why Carolin might not enjoy college. This will strengthen your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Try to separate ideas into clear paragraphs. For example, one paragraph can discuss reasons against college and another about benefits of working.
General Advice
Improve the language for clarity and grammatical accuracy to enhance understanding.
Coherence and Cohesion
You have included a clear structure with an opening and a closing, which adds to the clarity of the letter.
Task Achievement
The letter has a friendly and supportive tone, which is suitable for writing to a friend.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 150 words in writing task 1. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long letter will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 160 to 190 words in writing task 1. This will ensure a concise letter and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 20 minutes to write the letter and you need around 5 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long letter in 15 minutes.

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