You recently received a letter from your friend asking for advice about whether to go to college or try to get a job.You think he /she should get a job. say why he or she would not enjoy going to college explain why getting a job is a good idea for him or her *suggest types of job that would be suitable for him or her

#friend #advice #college #job #*say #*explain #idea #*suggest

Dear Carolin, Thank you for your recent letter and I can totally understand your confusion about whether to go to college or

choosing

Wrong verb form

choose

show examples

a work.Perhaps it would be a great idea to get a job as you have

lot

Change the article

a lot

show examples

of responsibilities. I think you might not be enjoying

to go

Change the verb form

going

show examples

to college because of many reasons.

Firstly

,you need to spend a lot of money

for

Change preposition

show examples

study

purpose

Fix the agreement mistake

purposes

show examples

,apart from that,it takes

long

Change the article

a long

show examples

time to complete the course.All in all, it isn't suitable for a person like you. If you find

out

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a job,it'll definitely add more

colours

Fix the agreement mistake

colour

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

your life.You

cab

Correct your spelling

can

show examples

easily manage your familial and social needs,especially you can have a satisfactory life. If I were you,I would select jobs in

Correct article usage

the IT

show examples

field

such

as profile developers and game designers.It won't be a great deal for you. Take care and

Verb problem

apply

show examples

stay in touch. All the best, Paanujah

Submitted by paanu95 on Tue Oct 08 2024

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Task Achievement

Include more specific reasons and examples for why Carolin might not enjoy college. This will strengthen your argument.

Coherence and Cohesion

Try to separate ideas into clear paragraphs. For example, one paragraph can discuss reasons against college and another about benefits of working.

General Advice

Improve the language for clarity and grammatical accuracy to enhance understanding.

Coherence and Cohesion

You have included a clear structure with an opening and a closing, which adds to the clarity of the letter.

Task Achievement

The letter has a friendly and supportive tone, which is suitable for writing to a friend.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 150 words in writing task 1. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long letter will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 160 to 190 words in writing task 1. This will ensure a concise letter and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 20 minutes to write the letter and you need around 5 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long letter in 15 minutes.

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2Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

147 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Word Count

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Sources of electrocity in four countries 2003-2008

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programs. To what extent do you agree or disagree??

Due to success of convenience food and ready-made meals, we are failing to pass on adequate culinary skills to the next generation. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

In some cultures, chldren are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. what are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?