Some people believe that money is the best gift for teenagers while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

There is a debate about whether
money
is the best gift for youngsters or not.
While
there is a negative impact that
money
oftentimes can detrimentally influence youngsters' behaviour, I believe that gifting
money
can give selection for getting goods which they want.
To begin
with, parents think that
money
has a great deal of negative aspects to affect
children
's behaviour. Admittedly, if
children
take
money
on their
birthday
, they will spend
money
in a bad way, buying harmful products like alcoholic drinks.
For example
, many health issues are arising because of AIDS which is able to bring about death.
Therefore
, gifting
money
as a present for
children
is not a certain way to gain pleasure if they can not spend wisely.
On the other hand
, in today's fast-paced and convenience-driven world
money
has many opportunities to purchase valuable and expensive things. These days a number of people give
children
's
birthday
money
as a present
instead
of getting some kind of thing as a souvenir.
This
is exemplified by, Canadian people giving
money
to their relatives'
birthday
or wedding ceremony so as to enhance the relationship.
In addition
,
money
can pave the path to choosing gifts for themselves,
such
as mechanical equipment.
As a result
of
this
, giving
money
is not only regarded as respect among all their nation but
also
gives a choice to get. In conclusion, giving
money
to
children
for their
birthday
is not appropriate all the time
due to
its inconvenience that damages their health condition and behaviour. In my view, there are some positive ways to go for goods if it impacts negatively.
Submitted by yoqubjonovjamshidbek23 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure clear and logical progression of ideas throughout the essay to enhance coherence and cohesion.
task achievement
Provide more concrete examples and evidence to support the points made, which will strengthen the task response.
task achievement
Avoid abrupt conclusion; ensure it summarizes the main points effectively and reflectively.
coherence cohesion
The essay includes an introduction that outlines the topic clearly, showcasing the ability to set the context for the discussion.
task achievement
Both viewpoints are discussed, demonstrating a complete and balanced response to the essay question.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial responsibility
  • budget
  • save
  • informed spending decisions
  • personal preferences
  • practical and efficient
  • unwanted or inappropriate gifts
  • impersonal
  • emotional value
  • thoughtfulness
  • personal consideration
  • wise financial decisions
  • frivolously
  • lasting memories and experiences
  • educational courses
  • hobby-related equipment
  • long-lasting positive impact
  • fostering interests and skills
What to do next:
Look at other essays: