Many manufacturd food and drinks contain high levels of sugar,which causes many health problems.Sugary products should be made more expensive o encourage peopleto consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

In recent years, some manufactured food, snacks and drinks contain high levels of fat and cholesterol.
However
, many
people
think that the
government
should handle
this
problem and warn
people
about how sugary
products
are very dangerous to their
health
and
also
they should raise the price of these
products
.
This
essay agrees with
this
idea because these
products
lead to serious
health
problems and explaining
this
to citizens helps us become a healthy nation. The authorities should warn
people
about processed foods or beverages because they might cause several chronic illnesses
such
as diabetes and pancreatic cancer
due to
what these
products
contain.
Moreover
, it is essential
government
to focus on especially educating parents about children’s
health
and the negative side effects that
products
can have on children’s brains and bodies.
For instance
, Japan has the highest rate of healthy children because there are many courses for parents teaching them about children’s
health
and what the best diet for children is.
However
, there are a number of nutrition experts on social media platforms which are
also
supported by the
government
that promote the importance of eating healthy food and
also
the dangers of eating processed food.
Additionally
, that encourages
people
to stop eating them after they know
this
information, I believe that the authorities should
also
raise the price of these kinds of
products
and impose high taxes on those companies, which eventually ensures that
people
do not buy them.
For example
, in China the proportion of candy sales is very low because the
government
has increased the price of candy and no one can purchase them so parents replace them with fruits. In conclusion, processed foods are very hazardous
products
and have high levels of sugar and fat which cause serious diseases I,
therefore
believe that the
government
should make sugary foods and drinks expensive
as well as
spread awareness among
people
about these
products
.
Submitted by ghazl.1998g on

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clear comprehensive ideas
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logical structure
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introduction conclusion present
You successfully introduced the topic in the opening paragraph and concluded with a clear opinion, which strengthens your argument overall.
relevant specific examples
There are relevant, specific examples provided that enhance the argument and provide real-world context, such as the examples of policies in Japan and China.
supported main points
The main points are generally well-supported, especially when it comes to explaining the potential health issues linked to sugar consumption and government intervention.

Your opinion

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • manufactured food and drinks
  • high levels of sugar
  • health problems
  • sugary products
  • consume less sugar
  • public health benefits
  • obesity rates
  • diabetes and heart disease
  • behavioral economics
  • healthier alternatives
  • economic implications
  • generate additional revenue
  • consumer freedom
  • dietary choices
  • socioeconomic impact
  • low-income individuals
  • education and awareness
  • financial penalties
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