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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #parents #children #members #society #school #place
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A child's education has never been about learning information and basic skills only. It has always included teaching the next generation how to be good members of
society
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.
Therefore
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,
this
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 cannot be the
responsibility
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 of the parents alone. In order to be a good member of any
society
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 the individual must respect and obey the rules of their
community
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 and share their values. Educating children to understand the need to obey rules and respect others always begins in the home and is widely thought to be the
responsibility
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 of parents. They will certainly be the first to help children learn what is important in life, how they are expected to behave and what role they will play in their world.
However
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, learning to understand and share the value system of a whole
society
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 cannot be achieved just in the home. Once a child goes to school, they
are entering
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enter
show examples
 a wider
community
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 where teachers and peers will have just as much influence as their parents do at home. At school, children will experience working and living with people from a whole variety of backgrounds from the wider
society
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.
This
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 experience should teach them how to co-operate with each other and how to contribute to the life of their
community
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. But to be a valuable member of any
community
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 is not like learning a simple skill. It is something that an individual goes on learning throughout life and it is the
responsibility
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 of every member of a
society
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 to take
responsibility
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 for helping the younger generation to become active and able members of that
society
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.
Submitted by TUTOO on

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Example
Integrate more specific examples or case studies to exemplify your points better and show relevance to real-life situations.
Conclusion
Ensure that your conclusion restates your opinion clearly or summarizes the key points discussed, which reinforces your main argument.
Coherence
The essay demonstrates a well-structured argument with a clear introduction and a strong flow of ideas.
Task Achievement
You provided a balanced discussion of both perspectives, addressing the roles of both parents and schools effectively.
Cohesion
The overall organization of the paragraphs is logical, contributing to the coherence of the response.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • good members of society
  • teach
  • parents
  • schools
  • responsibility
  • values
  • respect
  • empathy
  • responsibility
  • formal education
  • citizenship
  • ethics
  • social responsibility
  • lead by example
  • role models
  • conducive environment
  • extracurricular activities
  • community involvement
  • collaborate
  • holistic approach
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