Some people say that the increasing business and cultural contract between countries is a positive development, while others think that many countries will lose their national identities as a result. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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There is no doubt, that globalisation has developed, and some
people
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argue against it because countries lose national
atributes
Correct your spelling
attributes

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;
however
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,
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others

It seems that other may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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believe in
a
Correct article usage
the

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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positive effect of the phenomenon, and I support them. As for
negative
Correct article usage
the negative

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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development of vanishing borders between countries, the substitution of national food, dresses, and a way of living will be considered. Products of big enterprises, which are supported by an
advertise
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advertisement

The word advertise doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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, are more
competetive
Correct your spelling
competitive

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than local
goods
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and services.
For example
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, youth want to consume food from
McDonalds
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Mcdonald's
Mcdonalds'

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and content from
Netflics
Correct your spelling
Netflix

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, which
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes

It seems that the verb make does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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people
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

touch the
Amerecan
Correct your spelling
American

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Dream.
Furthermore
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, teenagers copy foreign social models and behave like their idols.
As a result
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, national features incrementally disappear and societies from different areas may transform
in
Change preposition
into

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one big group of similar
people
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.
On the other hand
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the growing
of
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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interdependence of economics and rising contacts lead to
spreading
Correct article usage
the spreading

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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of technologies and
opening
Correct article usage
the opening

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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new
Change preposition
of new

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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markets for
goods
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

is because many
sucessful
Correct your spelling
successful

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companies
buld
Correct your spelling
built

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their factories in other
contries
Correct your spelling
countries

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, implementing modern technics and
aproaches
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approaches

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in those areas.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

was realised in China, where American and European strong brands manufactured several products, so local companies copy technologies and China's economics now
florish
Correct your spelling
flourish

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.
Moreover
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, transparent
boarders
Correct your spelling
borders

The word boarders doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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ensure
acsess
Correct your spelling
access

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for customers to
best
Correct article usage
the best

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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goods
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

around the World. In the
past
Add a comma
past,

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase In the past. Consider adding a comma.

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in many
countries
Add a comma
countries,

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase in many countries. Consider adding a comma.

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people
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

used to buy expensive
low
Correct word choice
apply

There may be an adjective issue here.

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quality
Correct your spelling
low-quality

The word quality doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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items from local companies
,
Remove the comma
apply

It appears that you have an unnecessary comma before the dependent clause marker because. Consider removing the comma.

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because taxes for foreign
goods
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

were high. In conclusion, I firmly believe that the
posiive
Correct your spelling
positive

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development of globalisation
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as
a
Correct article usage
the

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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spawning of technologies and the wide range of imported
goods
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

outweigh the negative sides
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as decreasing popularity of local food or culture.

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task achievement
Try to develop your points in greater detail. For example, explain how teenagers copying foreign social models could have long-term consequences for national identities.
coherence cohesion
Ensure grammatical accuracy and correct spelling. For example, "attributes" is the correct spelling rather than "atributes".
coherence cohesion
Use a more varied vocabulary. This helps in presenting ideas more clearly. For example, instead of repeating "globalisation", use related terms like "international integration".
task achievement
Your essay presents a balanced discussion of both the positive and negative aspects of globalization.
task achievement
You provide specific examples, such as the influence of McDonald's and Netflix, to support your points.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-structured with a clear introduction and conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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