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Writing Samples
Band 7

The graph below shows the pollution levels in London between 1600 and 2000. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the pollution levels in London between 1600 and 2000. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#pollution #levels #london #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The diagram illustrates the rates of pollution in the city of London. The timeline is between 16
century
 and 20
century
.
Overall
, there are two different elements sulphur dioxide and smoke. Pollution levels count in
micrograms
 per cubic metre. As seen in the line graph, both lines were the same in 1580, nearly 0
micrograms
. In approximately 1750 all had increased,
however
, the proportion of dioxide was much better. Almost 750
micrograms
,
while
 the other
one
 had only 250. Both had decreased for 10 years, but after that, their results
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
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improved until the 19th
century
. In 1850 sulphur had its peak and reached an unbelievable index,
almost
Change preposition
of almost
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 900 per cubic metre. 50 years after smoke had risen to 500
micrograms
 and reached the best result. As shown in the illustration, the situation had decreased starting in the first half of the 20th
century
. The rate of smoke overtook the second
one
, and the first
one
 and
second
Add an article
the second
show examples
one
 had 270 and 260, respectively. Nearly
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2000, both have the minimum results as
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 were in the start.
Submitted by bizhanalikhan6 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words century, micrograms, one with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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