Some people believe today that everyone has a right to access to the Internet and that governments should provide this access for free. Other people believe that access to the internet is not a right and should be paid for like other services. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

In
the
Correct your spelling
this
show examples
era,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
advanced technology makes
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
widely spread around the world, It can deepen the linkage of
people
around the world, receiving new
knowleges
Correct your spelling
knowledge
knowledges
and checking the
trend
Fix the agreement mistake
trends
show examples
anytime anywhere.But there are some
people
Correct pronoun usage
who percieve
show examples
percieve
Correct your spelling
perceive
perceived
that
people
should pay for the
internet
to get the right
on using
Change preposition
to use
show examples
it. And
i
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I
show examples
strongly disagree
for
Change preposition
with
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this
point of view, but
i
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I
show examples
think
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
is a place to share our own
ideas
and
connecting
Wrong verb form
connect
show examples
everyone
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the globe. I am going to show my point of view by different aspects.
First,
about the purpose of
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
.
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
is for everyone to share their
ideas
Correct word choice
and
show examples
knowledge and
also
advertising for companies. If
people
have to pay for the
internet
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
there
show examples
will be fewer users on
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
by
Correct word choice
because
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there are many
peopel
Correct your spelling
people
in poverty. They cannot afford the
internet
fee. It makes
may
Correct your spelling
many
show examples
people
in less developed
country become not able
Verb problem
countries unable
show examples
to use
Add an article
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
. The information from those
countries
will dwindle, which
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
there is a gap between more developed
countries
and
les
Correct your spelling
less
developed
countries
, information
Correct pronoun usage
that are
show examples
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
not accessible to other
countries
will lead to the result that the
infromation
Correct your spelling
information
is not
transperant
Correct your spelling
transparent
in
those country
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that country
those countries
show examples
. Not just
only
Rephrase
apply
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for less developed
countries
, some poverty
family
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families
show examples
may not afford the fee,
with
Correct your spelling
which
show examples
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
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them only
can
Verb problem
apply
show examples
learn from school and
textbook
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textbooks
show examples
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
may exploit the learning
freedom
and opportunities of those children. As
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
result, the wealth gap will widen. Human rights and
freedom
will be reduced
by
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if
show examples
the news cannot be shown to the public, it breaks the original aim of
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
to connect everyone in the world.
second,
it
exploit
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exploits
show examples
the
freedom
of speech. As
i
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I
show examples
just
mention
Wrong verb form
mentioned
show examples
,
people
who can afford the fee cannot share their
ideas
and
demand
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demands
show examples
on the
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
. It will limit their
freedom
of speech
by
Change preposition
because
show examples
there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
no platform for them to express their needs,
ideas
and opinions. Which
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
people
who pay for the
internet
have greater power
on
Change preposition
over
show examples
controling
Correct your spelling
controlling
people
's thoughts and speaking. And
people
who didn't pay for will have no platform for them to speak up. It may cause the
unequality
Correct your spelling
inequality
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
intensify
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to intensify
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and block
the
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apply
show examples
communication
from
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between
show examples
different
stakeholder
Fix the agreement mistake
stakeholders
show examples
. To reduce the
hierachy
Correct your spelling
hierarchy
of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society, accessing
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
should not be paid
.
Change preposition
for.
show examples
Submitted by asllchkied on

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Coherence & Cohesion
Work on organizing your ideas more clearly. Consider using clear topic sentences for each paragraph and ensuring each paragraph focuses on one central point. This will help in creating a more logical structure throughout your essay.
Task Achievement
Improve the clarity of your ideas by developing each point more thoroughly. This requires not only posing arguments for both views but also elaborating on each point with relevant explanations or examples.
Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure the inclusion of a clear introduction and conclusion. In your introduction, briefly introduce both views, and state your standpoint. Conclude by summarizing your main arguments and restating your opinion.
Task Achievement
Your essay addresses both sides of the issue, which illustrates a balanced understanding of the topic.
Task Achievement
You have highlighted important issues like freedom of speech and socio-economic inequality, which are relevant to the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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