IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The graph below shows female unemployment rates in each country of the United Kingdom in 2013 and 2014. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows female unemployment rates in each country of the United Kingdom in 2013 and 2014. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The bar graph depicts information about the ratio of
women
Use synonyms
unemployment
Use synonyms
 in four countries of
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 Kingdom in two years 2013 and 2014. After analysing the bar graph, it can be seen clearly that a negligible difference was found in the
unemployment
Use synonyms
 rates of
women
Use synonyms
 in 2013 and 2014 in London
while
Linking Words
 in Wales, the
unemployment
Use synonyms
rate
Use synonyms
 was slightly higher in 2013 than in 2014 by a difference of 4%.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, it is noticeable that the joblessness
rate
Use synonyms
 of
women
Use synonyms
 in England and Wales was greater in 2013 than in 2014.
Linking Words
Further
Add a comma
Further,
show examples
 the bar graph shows that in 2013, the
unemployment
Use synonyms
rate
Use synonyms
 of
women
Use synonyms
 was 6.1% which increased to 6.7% in 2014 in Scotland
however
Linking Words
, in the fourth country of
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 Kingdom, in 2013 the
rate
Use synonyms
 of
unemployment
Use synonyms
 for
women
Use synonyms
 was 5.6% which declined to 4.6% in 2014.it is obvious that, in Scotland the
unemployment
Use synonyms
rate
Use synonyms
 was upper in 2013whilst it was lowest in 2014 in Northern Ireland .
Overall
Linking Words
, the
unemployment
Use synonyms
rate
Use synonyms
 was highest in England
whereas
Linking Words
 it was down in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Northern Ireland.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words women, unemployment, rate with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "difference" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: