Today more and more people want things instantly (goods, services, news, ) Why is this? Is it a positive or negative development?

Nowadays there is an increasing trend in society when consumers want to fulfil their needs immediately.

This

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essay agrees that

this

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direction has negative development because The Globalization Policy provides straight consumption,

while

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it makes humans lose their ability for constructive thinking. Whether I agree, that

this

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trend is negative.

Although

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there are transnational companies which are operators of Globalization Policy. Doubtless, it drives to make goods, services and news easily accessible. Generally,

that is

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the reason for the desire to have all at the moment.

For example

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, Apple company manufactures mobile phones under the iPhone trademark, it has over 15 generations of

this

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model.

Also

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, the company controls 36% of the market selling gadgets and software.

Therefore

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when they start to sell a New model of the Phone thousands of young adults wait for

this

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moment standing all night long in queue, wasting their

last

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money to get it, because of false privileges imposed by the company's aggressive marketing strategy. It illustrates the reason for wishing to have a thing as fast as it appears in store or even faster.

Nevertheless

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, it brings benefits in technology.

On the other hand

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, there are a lot of examples where wish to have surrogated your brain. Unfortunately, advertising and addiction to the "Wealth" lifestyle mean buying more and more useless things which bring only the illusion of happiness.

For example

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Nike

Correct article usage

the Nike

show examples

team produces extra expensive sportswear and shoes. Obviously, one item could cost over 500$. The National Bank's data says that almost 95% of loans go to buying

such

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wear and shoes. The same buyers have no money to have food, but wear Nike, says Adrian Paul, the sociologist from The State University

according to

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their explorings during 2014-2015. It demonstrates minuses of

such

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behaviour. In conclusion, the main purposes of the tendency to purchase items are the development of the current Global Policy and People's wise thinking absence.

interclass1982

Jun 16, 2024

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task achievement

Work on providing a clear thesis statement in your introduction. While you do state your stance, the reasoning is not very clear and concise.

task achievement

Make sure your main points are clearly distinct and well-supported. The current points are somewhat mixed and lack strong evidence.

coherence cohesion

Improve the logical flow of ideas. Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next one to enhance the overall readability of your essay.

task achievement

Provide clearer examples that directly support your main points. The examples used are somewhat relevant but could be more precise and impactful.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph focuses on one main idea and that this idea is introduced at the beginning of the paragraph. This will help improve the logical structure of the essay.

coherence cohesion

Revise the conclusion to better encapsulate the main points of your essay succinctly and clearly.

introduction conclusion present

You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which provides a good structure for your essay.

supported main points

The examples related to Apple and Nike are interesting and relevant to your points, even though they could be more directly tied to the main arguments.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

317 words

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Today more and more people want things instantly (goods, services, news, ) Why is this? Is it a positive or negative development?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Scientists agree that many people eat too much junk food and it is damaging their health. Some people think that this problem can be solved by educating people, while others belive that education will not work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

More and more businesses as weel as individuals are choosing to communicate either professionally or socially using technology rather than being face to face. Discus the advantages and disadvantages of using technology for communicating.

With traffic jams and pollution increasing every year in big cities, some people say that public transport should be free in big cities to help reduce these problems which are caused by cars.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries governments are investigating in new technology to deal with the public. Why is this happening? Do you think is an appropriate use of government money?