1)Studies have shown that in many countries the income gap between the rich and poor is ever increasing. •What problems can arise from this situation and what could be done to address this situation?
According to
research, there is an increasing trend of income
gap on
numerous countries between the rich and the poor. Change preposition
in
This
essay will state the possible problems that may develop on financial margins and the possible remedy on
the situation.
Change preposition
for
Firstly
, if there will be
a huge difference Wrong verb form
is
of
Change preposition
in
earning
between the people of every country, there will be an Fix the agreement mistake
earnings
increase
tendency of crime and corruption. Replace the word
increased
This
slowly develop
as the price of the products and Change the verb form
develops
service
will become premium as time goes by. Fix the agreement mistake
services
Furthermore
, the low
Add a hyphen
low-income
income
earners will resort to unspeakable behavior
just to survive. Change the spelling
behaviour
Moreover
, the people will hold on to activities that will help them earn money such
as hostage, thievery, and bank robberies. For example
, the Republic of Congo which have a big margin between the rich and the poor have high
recorded crime rate in their country. Correct article usage
a high
Additionally
, based on online statistics, most of their politicians are involved on
anomalies Change preposition
in
such
as gamblind
and money laundering.
Correct your spelling
gambling
Secondly
, hunger and health
risks will arise. As a result
, the pricing for food, health
services and insurance policies will be expensive. This
is due to
the fact that only the upper class can avail premium
Change preposition
of premium
servicies
. Correct your spelling
services
service
Meanwhile
citizens who Add a comma
Meanwhile,
needs
quality Change the verb form
need
health
will resort to limited and affordable options not minding whether it is appropriate.
On one hand, solution
can be implemented by the government to counteract the problems. The governing body can increase or regulate Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
minimum
wage so that the lower class can be able to Correct article usage
the minimum
adopt
to the changes in Correct your spelling
adapt
economy
. Add an article
the economy
As a result
, everyone can afford food, clothing and services. Another possible solution is to provide people with basic subsidies on essential services such
as healthcare and meal
.
In conclusion, conflicts may arise Fix the agreement mistake
meals
due to
erratic income
difference
Fix the agreement mistake
differences
suh
as high crime Correct your spelling
such
rate
, hunger, corruption and Fix the agreement mistake
rates
health
risks. Although
there are possible solution
to combat these Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
such
as basic subsidies and regulation of income
, the
society is still affected Correct article usage
apply
on
Change preposition
by
this
matter.Submitted by emmagallares on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
general
Improve sentence variety by using different sentence structures to enhance readability and engagement.
task achievement
Work on providing more specific examples or case studies to strengthen arguments and make them more persuasive.
general
Avoid minor grammatical errors to enhance the overall quality and fluidity of the essay.
task achievement
The essay effectively discusses both problems and solutions, providing a balanced response to the prompt.
coherence cohesion
The structure of the essay is clear and logical, with a defined introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
task achievement
The essay addresses the prompt directly and includes relevant problems and solutions related to the income gap issue.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!