The world has many towns and cities constructed in previous centuries that were more suitable and liveable for people in those times than they are now. What problems will this cause? What can be done to solve these problems?

#world #towns #cities #centuries #liveable #people #times

People come to

cities

for a better living. There are numerous opportunities available in towns and

cities

such

as better employment and education

opportinities

Correct your spelling

opportunities

. People believe that if they migrate to towns and

cities

, their lives will be changed a lot. Their children will get

better

Add an article

a better

show examples

education and

get

Verb problem

apply

show examples

a suitable environment to grow.

This

migration makes

cities

densly

Correct your spelling

densely

populated. There

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

competitions

Fix the agreement mistake

competition

show examples

in accessing every

facilities

Change to a singular noun

facility

show examples

in towns and

cities

Submitted by rahman_rehana on Fri Oct 11 2024

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task response

The essay addresses the topic by discussing the reasons for migration to cities, such as better employment and education opportunities, but does not fully address the problems caused by old towns and cities not being suitable for modern living or solutions to those problems. Try to focus more on the specific problems and solutions related to old city infrastructure.

coherence cohesion

You have introduced the topic and explained why people move to cities, which is a good start. However, the essay lacks a clear structure, including a proper introduction and conclusion that summarize and reiterate the main points. Consider organizing your points into distinct paragraphs for introduction, problems, solutions, and conclusion.

task response

The essay explains the main reasons why people migrate to cities, which is a good foundational point for your discussion.

task response

You have demonstrated an understanding of the topic by referencing employment and education as key factors, which is relevant.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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2Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

1 paragraphs

71 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

degraded infrastructure
outdated infrastructure
modern requirements
deterioration
modern amenities
adequate healthcare facilities
educational institutions
recreational areas
congestion
overpopulation
strain resources
ancient construction methods
environmental standards
pollution levels
inefficient energy use
narrow streets
transportation
emergency services
urban redevelopment
preservation of heritage
smart city technologies
sustainable urban planning
retrofitting
public transportation networks
green spaces

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The world has many towns and cities constructed in previous centuries that were more suitable and liveable for people in those times than they are now. What problems will this cause? What can be done to solve these problems?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to cooperate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that homeschooling should be banned because it has several drawbacks. Others think that it has a number of benefits. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

You recently went on holiday and your friend lent you a travel guidebook. Write a letter to friend. In your letter: - tell your friend about the holiday - explain how the guidebook was helpful - say when and how you will return the guidebook

Topic: It is common for young people to go abroad to study at university instead of studying in their home contry. Do the advantages of studying at university in another country outweigh the disadvantages?