Internet technology means people do not need to travel to foreign countries to understand how others live. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Some
people
believe that using the internet
is enough to understand other countries
’ cultures and how they live. I disagree with this
viewpoint because information from the internet
is not always true. Moreover
, there are a few things that can be understood by visiting it such
as food and the natural environment.
Sometimes the information from the internet
about the culture of certain countries
is not complete or inaccurate. For instance
, Batik motifs are Indonesian but some sources mention that it comes from Malaysia. It creates conflicts that can be solved by studying the history of the culture. Additionally
, Framing the ease of life also
often occurs in some countries
. It means that the internet
only provides the positive things about certain countries
and removes the bad ones. For example
, despite the number of jobs, many wild animals are often found in Australia. Therefore
, it is better to not trust the internet
directly and do some cross-checks in the countries
.
Coming to other countries
is also
necessary when people
need to try some foods from there as the internet
only gives people
descriptions of the foods. Additionally
, they can ask the local residents to recommend some menus. However
, sometimes pricing for tourists is different with local residents, but it is still worthwhile to try once in a lifetime. For example
, the price of Ramen in Japan is 10 yen for local people
, but it may increase to 12 yen for travelers
. Change the spelling
travellers
Besides
foods, the natural environment also
cannot be felt through a description. Travelers can feel the fresh air, enjoy the scenery and moreover
, they can take a picture with those as a background. Usually, mountains or beaches are the most popular places to be visited.
In conclusion, it is true that the internet
gives people
information about how others live. But, there are some cultures that can be understood by visiting the countries
.Submitted by ivannizar on
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coherence cohesion
To further enhance the coherence of your essay, consider organizing your points in well-defined paragraphs with clear topic sentences. This helps guide the reader through your argument more smoothly.
task achievement
Ensure every example directly supports your main argument or point. This will contribute to a more robust task response.
coherence cohesion
Conclude with a summary of your arguments and a restatement of your opinion to reinforce your standpoint, further improving coherence and cohesion.
task achievement
The essay clearly disagrees with the statement and maintains this position throughout, demonstrating a strong task achievement.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main argument, enhancing the coherence of the piece.
task achievement
Use of specific examples, such as Batik motifs and pricing differences in Japan, adds depth and relevance to the essay.
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