some people think that competition at work, at school, in daily life is a good thing. others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Many today are of the belief that a competitive environment at work, school, and in daily life might be beneficial,
while
others think teamwork is more productive and fruitful. This
essay believes that group activities might have more advantages, and it will elaborate on it.
To begin
with, people
often tend to compare themselves with their colleagues, classmates, and even their siblings. Therefore
, this
comparison injects energy to
them to strive. Change preposition
into
For example
, many students consider their school friends as a
Correct article usage
apply
rival
, and Fix the agreement mistake
rivals
this
perspective encourages them to get better marks . Additionally
, due to
this
attitude, individuals usually want to develop their skills and knowledge in order to be outstanding among their families or other acquaintances. In brief, these perspective
might contribute humans to Change the determiner
this perspective
these perspectives
keep
themselves updated. Wrong verb form
keeping
Nevertheless
, this
issue,
exerts Remove the comma
apply
a
substantial pressure on Remove the article
apply
people
and fosters a hectic environment, because people
become self-centered
and think only about their personal achievements.
Change the spelling
self-centred
However
, many people
benefit from working as a team and report their satisfaction. Teamwork is always less daunting and less overwhelming because tasks are splitted
and each group mate knows what to do. Correct your spelling
split
In addition
, during group activities
Add a comma
activities,
people
can shape long lasting
friendships, which add more Add a hyphen
long-lasting
values
to their Fix the agreement mistake
value
goal
. The other positive point of Fix the agreement mistake
goals
this
approach is learning, each person can acquire new skills from others. For instance
, in the
successful companies managers ask employees to form their own groups to work on different projects. During these projects, they communicate with each other and share their experiences. In short, teamwork is fruitful for both Correct article usage
apply
company
and Correct article usage
the company
people
Correct article usage
the people
due to
the learning process and friendly atmosphere among team members.
In conclusion, despite the minor merits of competitiveness in the workplace or school, unfortunately, it increases the possibility of conflict and makes people
selfish in the long term.As a resualt
, team collaboration is more practical, because it helps Correct your spelling
result
people
to impart their knowledge to each other and focusing
on their mutual goal. Wrong verb form
focus
This
essay believes corporation
between individuals is much more imperative than competing with each other.Correct your spelling
cooperation
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task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples or evidence to support the points made about competitiveness and cooperation. This could improve the depth of your discussion.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph starts with a clear topic sentence that previews the main idea of the paragraph, thereby enhancing clarity and structure.
introduction conclusion present
The essay effectively introduces the topic and presents a clear thesis statement expressing the writer's opinion.
logical structure
There is a balanced discussion of both views, with each viewpoint explored in separate paragraphs, contributing to a clear structure.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion summarizes the key points effectively and reinforces the writer’s opinion, providing a strong ending to the essay.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?