Nowadays, many people spend less and less time at home. What are the causes of this? What are the effects of this on individuals and on the society?
These days, a large number of individuals are not spending much
time
at home. A major reason of
Change preposition
for
this
problem is their busy schedule, and employeers
are working Correct your spelling
employers
employees
over
Correct your spelling
overtime
time
to complete tasks on time
. Because of their busy life
, they are not focusing on there
physical fitness Correct your spelling
their
this
would Correct pronoun usage
which
leads
to Change the verb form
lead
health
issue
later in Fix the agreement mistake
issues
life
.
Because of lot
of Add an article
a lot
work
pressure employeers
are working overtime to complete Correct your spelling
employees
employers
work
before deadline. When the deadline is coming near managers are forcing
their team members to complete all pending Wrong verb form
force
work
before going home. In some company
employees Fix the agreement mistake
companies
are
Change the verb form
are working
work
whole
night, so that they can Correct article usage
the whole
delivery
Replace the word
deliver
product
on Fix the agreement mistake
products
time
. For example
: IT companys
like TCS and Wipro are forcing Correct your spelling
companies
there
employees to Replace the word
their
work
12 to 14 hours to achive
goals.
After coming Correct your spelling
achieve
from
Rephrase
home from
work
people don't have much time
for doing physical activities, and this
would lead
to Wrong verb form
leads
health
issue
like Change the noun form
issues
diabeties
and heart Correct your spelling
diabetes
problem
. Fix the agreement mistake
problems
Whereas
, their mental health
also
distrub
. Because of not spending Correct your spelling
disturb
time
much time
with their family
some individuals get into depression and other mental problems. Add a comma
family,
For example
: recently a CA of multinational
company Add an article
a multinational
commited
suicide because of extra Correct your spelling
committed
work
she can't
Wrong verb form
couldn't
to
manage Change the verb form
apply
this
work
and life
got into depression.
In conclusion, we should have to
learn to maintain Verb problem
apply
good
Correct article usage
a good
work
balance life
, Change preposition
in life
this
help
us to spend Change the verb form
helps
time
with our family. As well as
,
one should Remove the comma
apply
also
focus on there
physical and mental Correct your spelling
their
health
. Company
should Add an article
The company
A company
also
make some work
policy
which Fix the agreement mistake
policies
help
the Change the verb form
helps
employs
to go back to their home on Replace the word
employees
time
.Submitted by merujain2221 on
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coherence cohesion
Enhance the logical structure by better organizing your essay into clear paragraphs. Each paragraph should develop a single main point more clearly.
task achievement
Improve your use of examples by integrating them more clearly into your argument. Ensure that every example directly supports the point you're making.
task achievement
Refine your grammar and vocabulary to ensure clear and precise communication. This will help effectively convey your ideas.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, making it easy for the reader to understand the main points.
task achievement
The essay addresses the task by identifying causes and effects of the issue on individuals and society.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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