Some companies sponsor sports as away to advertise themselves. Some people think it is good, while others think there are disadvantages to this. discuss boyh sides and give your opinion.

These days, the cost that governments have to invest in
sports
is a lot, so they find some sponsors for them; in fact, the companies that spend money on
sports
advertise themselves, but the problem is that a group of people do not accept
this
work. In my opinion,
this
phenomenon is a new commercial that has benefits for not only
sports
but
also
businesses owing to the fact that the sportsmen have access to the newest facilities that help them to improve their skills and the firms that fund gyms publicities their goods and climbing their sales. On the one hand, some communities think that sponsoring is the best choice inasmuch as the cost of famous gyms is so much in obtaining good players, new equipment, and so on;
furthermore
, these places cannot income these prices from other works
such
as selling tickets, goods, and so forth.
On the other hand
, some population believe that commercials and sponsors have bad affection for the sport .
In other words
, the managers of
sports
clubs are the function of businessmen.
For instance
, it is important that they get some athletes that they select and sometimes they should obtain not good ones , they can not pay for their idea in the gyms
due to
the fact that they have to list the money spent to the sponsor, they have to publicity the companies that fund them everywhere and so on.
To sum up
, Even though the sponsors have a range of matters, in my view, the merits of improving
sports
centres and the level of competition are very crucial.
Submitted by maryamkazemi968 on

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task response
Your essay addresses both sides of the topic, but you could strengthen your argument by providing more specific examples and evidence supporting your viewpoint. Try to illustrate your points with specific instances or studies to make your response more compelling.
task response
To enhance clarity, try to develop each paragraph with a clear main idea followed by supporting details. Some of your ideas are a little vague, and some sections could benefit from a more detailed exploration of your points. Aim to further elaborate on each argument to heighten reader understanding.
coherence and cohesion
There is some logical structure in your essay; however, the flow of ideas can be improved. You can achieve better cohesion by using transitional phrases to link ideas and paragraphs more smoothly.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure each paragraph links logically to the next to guide the reader through your arguments. Although you start with an introduction and end with a conclusion, consider refining the flow of each section so they connect more seamlessly.
coherence and cohesion
You provided an introduction and a conclusion, framing your discussion within a clear structure.
task response
Both sides of the argument were considered, reflecting a balanced approach to the task.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • sponsor
  • advertise
  • brand exposure
  • visibility
  • brand image
  • reputation
  • targeted marketing
  • product placement
  • endorsement
  • support
  • community
  • athletes
  • economic growth
  • oversaturation
  • commercialization
  • unfair advantage
  • financially stronger
  • ethical concerns
  • influence
  • diversion of funds
  • negative publicity
  • backlash
  • beneficial
  • overall
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