Nowadays many people travel to foreign countries for pleasure. Some believe this travel has a negative impact on the countries travelled to. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #travel #countries #pleasure #believe #impact

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People

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have different views as to whether travelling overseas is the most effective way of finding a sense of pleasure.

While

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there are some drawbacks of travelling, I believe that it would be better to deal with the concerns of life and establish personal relationships with other cultures.

To begin

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with, travelling has some demerits associated with financial barriers and environmental aspects. The inconvenience of

travel

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is that it is not equal for all individuals,

for instance

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, many

people

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are not able to afford to visit abroad because of financial challenges.

For example

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, disadvanced

countries

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can not make opportunities for their population to

travel

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to another continent.

Moreover

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, one of the fundamental problems is environmental pollution

that is

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caused by tourists. The number of natural disasters can negatively influence visited

countries

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' cultural backgrounds and the conservation of the environment.

As a result

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this

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, many historical destinations can be taken a hit by visitors. On the other side of the coin is that in today's fast-paced and convenience-driven world,

travel

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is the most widespread activity among all cultures irrespective of age.

Firstly

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, it helps to escape from the concerns of life

such

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as the troubles of work.Oftentimes, many

people

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have the intention to

travel

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to foreign

countries

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not only to reduce stress and relax on holidays

due to

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the scenery of nature.

Secondly

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, if

people

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travel

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to other

countries

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where

people

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are strange, they will make friends and enhance unity.

Besides

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that

people

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will have information in terms of these places' history and traditions.

Subsequently

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, there will be appeared a sense of happiness and pleasure after travelling.

To sum up

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although

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some

people

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think there are some negative impacts on

countries

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' finances and the environment, In my opinion, increasing the rate of

travel

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can create the advantages of cooperation with foreign

countries

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Furthermore

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, a sense of happiness can be made by travelling.

Submitted by yoqubjonovjamshidbek23 on Sun Oct 13 2024

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task achievement

Consider including more specific examples to support your points. Although the essay provides some general examples, adding specific instances would strengthen your argument.

task achievement

Work on enhancing the clarity and comprehensiveness of some ideas. Some points could be expanded with more detail or clarity to fully convey your argument.

coherence cohesion

Ensure each main point is thoroughly supported with evidence and examples. This will help in building a stronger argument and improving task response.

coherence cohesion

The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, successfully framing the argument.

coherence cohesion

There is a logical flow of ideas throughout most of the essay, making it easy for the reader to follow.

17
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

310 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Cultural exchanges
Global connections
Tourism boosts
Local economy
Over-tourism
Environmental degradation
Landmarks
Commodification of culture
Authentic cultural expressions
Cultural homogenization
Tourism infrastructure
Public services
Disrespect local customs

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