Some countries have introduced laws to limit working hours for employees. Why are these laws introduced? Do you think they are a positive or negative development?

Managing
time
between
work
and family sometimes
put
Wrong verb form
puts
show examples
an employee into a stressful situation,
that is
why some countries implemented a rule wherein workers should have limited working hours. I am in a view that with
this
law, a huge beneficial development can appear.
To begin
with,
implementation
Correct article usage
the implementation
show examples
of rules and regulations leads to
organized
Correct article usage
an organized
show examples
nation. If a law which
prioritize
Change the verb form
prioritizes
show examples
the importance of employees'
time
is being followed by all employers,
this
will promote a good
work
-life balance for workers.
For example
, in New Zealand, the government insists that workers go home and play with their kids after the limited and finished job hours and even
discourage
Correct subject-verb agreement
discourages
show examples
the employees
to
Change preposition
from working
show examples
work
overtime.
Also
, they promote that weekends are for family to go on vacation and
in
Change preposition
as
show examples
result
Correct article usage
a result
show examples
, employees will show equal management between family
time
and the hours spent in the office. As witnessed in different countries regulating the same law, there were a
gretear
Correct your spelling
greater
number of positive results seen. People were more stable, experienced less
work
-related stress and most importantly,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
demonstrated a healthy mental state which in turn
help
Wrong verb form
helped
show examples
within
Change preposition
with
show examples
their choice of
work
. They learned to juggle the
time
between
work
and family or leisure, they became more productive in their field and even presented
a more realistic ideas
Correct the article-noun agreement
more realistic ideas
a more realistic idea
show examples
in their
work
.
In other words
,
this
will ensure a
high
Replace the word
highly
show examples
self-productive and
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
more life-oriented country. In conclusion, limited
time
doing a job shows more benefits rather than negative results. I certainly think that implementing
this
kind of
laws
Fix the agreement mistake
law
show examples
will surely produce a nation with a healthy community.
Submitted by cng123 on

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clarity
Clarify some sentence structures to enhance readability. For example, break longer sentences into shorter ones for better understanding.
coherence
Include transitions between paragraphs to help the flow of ideas and maintain a logical connection between them.
examples
Provide more relevant specific examples to further illustrate your points.
introduction
The essay provides a clear introduction that outlines the topic and presents the writer's positive stance on limiting working hours.
examples
The examples used, such as the policy in New Zealand, effectively support the main argument about the benefits of limited working hours.
conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the points made, reinforcing the writer's positive stance on the development.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • 1. Burnout
  • 2. Work-life balance
  • 3. Productivity
  • 4. Diminishing returns
  • 5. Ethical responsibility
  • 6. Exploitation
  • 7. Fair labor practices
  • 8. Chronic illnesses
  • 9. Job creation
  • 10. Unemployment rates
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