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Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Most of the urgent problems can only be solved with international cooperation. To what extent do you agree or disagree？

#cooperation #disagree？
When governments have been founded in the world they have been having interactions with each other.
In addition
, Today, a group of people believe that solving their essential matters for which they cannot have any solutions must be obtaining
aid
 from global
countries
. I subscribe to
this
 idea owing to the fact that when we get help from other
countries
 we can solve our
issues
 faster with high efficiency and less negative affection. On the
one
 hand, other
countries
aid
one
country
 on its matters that can solve them immediately inasmuch as the other governments have some experiences or devices that help them to find good solutions. To illustrate, when the 13 young football players with their coach were in a cave in Thailand, global
aid
 could
abandon
Wrong verb form
abandoned
show examples
 them with their special tools from the cave, which all sections of it are full of water,quickly.
On the other hand
, when a
country
 has problems that are really crucial, it is important that get help from international cooperation to have less effect on the items that are related to the matters; in fact, when the necessary
issues
 are not solved, it can be improved and all aspects of
one
country
 have
issues
.
For instance
, the economy is the main factor of
one
country
;
hence
, when
one
country
 has several problems in its economy after that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 if the authorities do not solve it, all industrial centres, agriculture and so on would be involved.
To sum up
, In my opinion, the best method that global
countries
 can solve their insolvent
issues
 which are really urgent is that they get
aid
 from other
countries
.
Submitted by maryamkazemi968 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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