Putting criminals into prisons is not an effective way to deal with them. Instead, education and job training should be offered. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Many
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

argue that
put
Wrong verb form
putting

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb put. Consider changing it.

show examples
criminals into prisons
in
Correct your spelling
is

The word in doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
not the best way to deal with them,
while
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

others
belive
Correct your spelling
believe

The word belive doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
that
give
Wrong verb form
giving

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb give. Consider changing it.

show examples
them
education
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and job training
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

show examples
will enhance their actions.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, in
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

essay, I will discuss both perspectives and provide my own opinion. On the one hand, if the person
made
Verb problem
committed

There may be a verb use issue here.

show examples
a crime, he must have a punishment for
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

action. Putting him in
peisons
Correct your spelling
prison
prisons

If you don’t want peisons to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

is the best way to
punishment
Replace the word
punish

The word punishment doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
him, but
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

it can impact him
negativel
Correct your spelling
negatively
negative

If you don’t want negativel to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

and make him a very bad one.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, when a man
made
Verb problem
commits

There may be a verb use issue here.

show examples
a wicked action, the police officer
will decided
Wrong verb form
decides

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb will decided. Consider changing it.

show examples
to put him in jail, after his
period
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

place he will continue his
criminals
Replace the word
crimes

The word criminals doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
and
destroying
Wrong verb form
destroy

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb destroying. Consider changing it.

show examples
the rules.
Therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

place can put
limit
Add an article
a limit

The noun phrase limit seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
to their
actives
Replace the word
activities

The word actives doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
but it will be for a short
period
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
On the other hand
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
inculd
Verb problem
apply

There may be a verb use issue here.

show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
education
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and job
trining
Correct your spelling
training

The word trining doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
as a rule in jail for criminals, can make them good individuals, and after their
period
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

place they can start new lives with new goals.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
on
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
some
jail
Fix the agreement mistake
jails

It seems that jail may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
in
Europe
Add a comma
Europe,

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase on some jail in Europe. Consider adding a comma.

show examples
they
offers
Change the verb form
offer

It appears that the subject pronoun they and the verb offers are not in agreement. Consider changing the verb.

show examples
books to read and give these
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

an
education
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
That is
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

their idea for punishment
bad
Change preposition
of bad

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, let them have a second chance to start from
beginning
Add an article
the beginning

The noun phrase beginning seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
.
Moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
education
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and learning new skills can always put
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

on
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
good places, and I firmly support
that
Correct determiner usage
the

It seems that determiner use may be incorrect here.

show examples
idea that everyone
deserve
Change the verb form
deserves

It appears that the indefinite pronoun everyone does not agree with the verb deserve in your sentence. Consider changing the form of the verb.

show examples
a second chance. In conclusion, bad citizens must have a
period
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

that
make
Change the verb form
makes

The plural verb make does not appear to agree with the singular subject a period. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

show examples
them feel guilty about their actions but at the same time they should have a second try for their future, and become
a
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
good
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

that
Correct pronoun usage
who

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

show examples
will
beneficial
Replace the word
benefit

The word beneficial doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
their country and
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

themself,and
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

will not happen without offering to them
education
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and work training in
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

time.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Focus on strengthening the argument by including more convincing examples. Examples provided in the essay are quite brief and general.
task achievement
Work on improving the clarity of ideas and expressions. This will allow for a more comprehensive response to the essay question.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next to maintain a more logical structure.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which help in framing the argument.
task achievement
Both perspectives of the argument are addressed, which adds depth to the discussion.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • recidivism
  • reintegration
  • rehabilitation
  • punitive measures
  • mindset
  • behavioral change
  • workforce preparation
  • prospects
  • reoffending
  • employment opportunities
  • socioeconomic
  • low-risk offenders
  • serious offenders
  • balance
  • productive members of society
  • economic burden
  • public safety
  • offender rehabilitation
  • transformative programs
What to do next:
Look at other essays: