Some people think that they can make as much noise as they want, while others think that the amount of noise people make should be strictly controlled. Discuss both views and give your opinion

People
have different views about whether
noise
can be made by
people
as much
they
Correct word choice
as they
show examples
want, or it can be hardly controlled.
While
making
noise
is obvious, I believe that making unnecessary
noise
should be prohibited. There are a number of reasons why
humankindkind
Correct your spelling
humankind
makes different kinds of noises. One possible reason is that it is a basic right of humans as
humankindkind
Correct your spelling
humankind
has the freedom to make any kind of
noise
. By making
noise
people
can interact with others .Another reason is that by making
noise
people
can express themselves. We cannot convey our feelings like anger, fear happiness without making any kind of
noise
.
For instance
, at any wedding party or anniversary, we invite a DJ party or play music to enjoy the achievement .
Finally
, in
this
world, most of the living beings can make
noise
to report their location. Despite the above arguments, it cannot be denied that loud and excessive
noise
can be harmful to
people
in many ways.
Firstly
, intense
noise
can be the cause of losing concentration as it can be distractive.
Therefore
,
people
can lose their attention from various tasks.
Secondly
, loud and high-volume
noise
could be the reason for
noise
pollution which can pollute the environment. It
also
may cause some health issues.
For instance
, hearing loss or injury to the ear is a very serious problem
people
are facing nowadays. In conclusion,
although
people
want to make
noise
as per their
need
Fix the agreement mistake
needs
show examples
with so many drawbacks, I would argue that excessive
noise
should be strictly controlled at any cost to help
people
lead a peaceful life.
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task achievement
Consider using more varied vocabulary and sentence structures to enhance the richness of your essay, which can contribute positively to your task response.
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Try to provide more specific examples to illustrate your points, as this can make your argument more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving the transitions between paragraphs and ideas to achieve a smoother flow. More cohesive linking words can enhance readability.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction that outlines the topic and presents your position, which creates a strong foundation for the argument.
coherence cohesion
There is a logical structure to your argument, with main points articulated in separate paragraphs, which helps in maintaining a clear direction throughout the essay.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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