Too much emphasis is placed on going university for academic study. People should be encouraged to do vocational training, because there is a lack of qualified tradespeople such as electricians or plumbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Due to
a lack of qualified tradespeople, these are the main jobs that we depend on them a lot. This
essay totally agrees that people should be encouraged to do vocational training. While
studying in university
will not develop their skills.
On the one hand, electricians and manual jobs are very important to society, and we can't live without these jobs. Therefore
, having a qualified worker is an important thing very each city.
Labourers
can't be qualified only by studying in class, they need to practice in workshops, most of their education
requires shops, to practice what they learned in order to become qualified
person.
Add an article
a qualified
the qualified
For instance
, the
UK Correct article usage
apply
education
requires that part of studying, that each labourer most
attend more than 50% of his Correct your spelling
must
education
in workshops and that is
very helpful for them.
On the other hand
, university
education
is very important, but I believe it's not helping the labourers
.
Universities should focus on other majors of study such
as math, space and other sciences.
Which are required university
support for education
. Teaching labourers
full-time it's not helpful 100% and due to
that. Available there classes to
other majors of Change preposition
for
education
will be much better for everyone.
In conclusion, I believe labourers
' education
need
workshops for training and to become qualified not Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
university
, Moreover
, universities should be teaching the
professional other majors.Correct article usage
apply
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task achievement
Your main arguments are clear and relate directly to the topic, which focuses on vocational training versus university education for tradespeople like electricians and plumbers. However, some points could be developed in more detail, particularly regarding the specific benefits of vocational training over a university education. Additional relevant examples would strengthen your position.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a recognized introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your argument. Some paragraphs could be better connected and ideas further elaborated to show a more logical progression from one point to the next. This would enhance the coherence of your essay.
task achievement
Your essay identifies the importance of vocational training for trades and effectively argues against university education for these roles.
task achievement
You effectively highlight the societal importance of tradespeople and the necessity for practical training through workshops.
coherence cohesion
You successfully provide a structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which helps in maintaining a clear overall flow.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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