IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The table below shows information about the population of New Zealand from 2011 to 2012 by age group. Summarize the formation by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The table below shows information about the population of New Zealand from 2011 to 2012 by age group. Summarize the formation by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.
#minutes #information #population #zealand #age #group #formation #features #comparisons
This
Change the determiner
These
show examples
tables
Fix the agreement mistake
table
show examples
 depicts
Correct article usage
a multie
show examples
multie
Correct your spelling
multiple
multi
 of groups
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
ages
 in New Zealand between 2011 and 2012 It is clear from the graph that all
ages
 4.381.269 to 4.410.284 had
increase
Change the verb form
increased
show examples
 gradually because
develoment
Correct your spelling
development
human
Change preposition
of human
show examples
reproduciton
Correct your spelling
reproduction
.
According to
 what is shown
Firstly
,
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
 group
of
Change preposition
aged
show examples
ages
 under 15 had
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 mildly
comparison
Change preposition
in comparison
show examples
 with the
ages
 between 15 and 39 had
decrease
Wrong verb form
decreased
show examples
 very quickly.
Secondly
, the groups
age
Wrong verb form
aged
show examples
 from 40 to 64
thier
Correct your spelling
their
per cent had
Correct your spelling
percentage
show examples
 between 1.331.907 and 1.339.898 had
increase
Change the verb form
increased
show examples
so
Rephrase
apply
show examples
so swiftly because
thier
Correct your spelling
there
had
Verb problem
were
show examples
 a lot of people same
this
age
.
Thirdly
,
ages
Correct article usage
the ages
show examples
 who are above 65
year
Change to a plural noun
years
show examples
 they had
increase
Change the verb form
increased
show examples
 so quickly from 2011 to 2012 but
Also
,
thier
Correct your spelling
their
fuger
Change the capitalization
Fuger
show examples
 had little
cause
Correct word choice
because
show examples
this
age
 is
bager
Correct your spelling
badger
 and
thier
Correct your spelling
they
 had most exposed to tried and diseases until they
die
Wrong verb form
died
show examples
.
To sum up
, we could say that the group who
age
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 under 15 it more
fuger
Change the capitalization
Fuger
show examples
 comparison with who
age
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
pluse
Correct your spelling
plus
 65
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 per cent fuger it is so small.
Submitted by shougaldhafere on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words ages, increase, age, thier with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "comparison" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 4 times.
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