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Writing Samples
Band 8

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together.To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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A number of
people
 see
music
 as a good way of connecting
people
 from different cultures and age groups. I agree with
this
 because
music
taste
 can bring
people
 closer to each other.
Moreover
,
music
 is universal, meaning that anyone of different cultures and ages can listen and develop a liking towards it. First of all, humans tend to be more drawn towards those with the same interests. Liking the same type of songs can create many fun conversations and interactions,
such
 as exchanging playlists and albums, and talking about artists or musicians, which can lead to a bond. From personal experience, I find it much easier to get close to someone with the same
music
taste
 as me. I have made multiple friends both much older than me and from other countries through similarity in
music
taste
.
Secondly
,
although
music
 comes in different languages, it does not always need lyrical understanding, rather it's the musicality that attracts audiences.
Music
 can be understood instrumentally by anyone of any culture, which means that
people
 are able to connect with each other diminishing their generational gap.
For instance
, me and my grandfather have the exact same
taste
 in
music
, so we are always talking and recommending new songs to each other, which in my opinion creates closeness between us. In conclusion, I strongly support that
music
 is a great way to connect
people
 from differing generations and from around the world.
This
 is because
music
 can bring individuals with the same
music
taste
 together, creating a connection.
In addition
, anyone can like
music
 even if they do not understand the language and age makes no difference.
Submitted by minnikamol on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Try to further enhance coherence by clearly linking ideas from one paragraph to the next, ensuring smooth transitions. Each paragraph should lead logically to the next to maintain the reader's flow of understanding.
Task Response
Consider including a counter-argument to demonstrate a fuller view of the topic. Acknowledging another perspective can strengthen your argument and show a thorough understanding of the topic.
Introduction and Conclusion
The essay consistently stays on topic with a well-crafted introduction and conclusion that effectively summarize the main points.
Examples Used
Personal examples are clearly relevant and illustrate the points being made, enhancing the credibility and engagement of the response.
Complete Response
The essay provides a complete response to the task, effectively arguing for how music connects people across different cultures and ages.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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