IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

#aim #science #people #lives #answers
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It is considered that
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
 important goal of
science
Use synonyms
to
Add a missing verb
is to
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 make
individuals
Change noun form
individuals'
individual's
show examples
Use synonyms
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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 better. I agree with the statement, Because
science
Use synonyms
play
Change the verb form
plays
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 a very important role in
Use synonyms
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
 health,
without
Correct word choice
and without
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 proper medical
science
Use synonyms
 will be very difficult to
safe
Replace the word
save
show examples
anyones
Correct your spelling
anyone
anyone's
live
Replace the word
life
show examples
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, developments in
technology
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
plays
Change the verb form
play
show examples
 a great role in making
Correct article usage
a person
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person
Change noun form
person's
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life
Use synonyms
 easier. The main aim of medical
science
Use synonyms
 is to save
Use synonyms
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
Use synonyms
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
. Doctors and scientists are researching
in finding
Change preposition
to find
show examples
cure
Fix the agreement mistake
cures
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of
Change preposition
for
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 every
diseases
Change to a singular noun
disease
show examples
,
such
Linking Words
cancer
Change preposition
as cancer
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, depression etc. Because of recent
development
Fix the agreement mistake
developments
show examples
 in medical
Use synonyms
science
Add a comma
science,
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 it can be seen that
success
Correct article usage
the success
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 rate
to save
Change preposition
of saving
show examples
any
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
lifes
Correct your spelling
lives
show examples
is
Verb problem
has
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increase
Replace the word
increased
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 drastically.
For example
Linking Words
:
at
Change preposition
during
show examples
 the time covid pandemic doctors and
researches
Correct your spelling
researchers
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 were working very hard
in finding
Change preposition
to find
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
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 vaccine
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 corone,
Linking Words
Correct word choice
and at
show examples
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the end they
become
Wrong verb form
became
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 successful in their mission.
This
Linking Words
proofs
Replace the word
proves
show examples
 the dedication of doctors towards saving
Use synonyms
life
Add an article
the life
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 of
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
. In the field of
technology
Use synonyms
,
engineers
Change noun form
engineers'
engineer's
show examples
 main aim
to
Add a missing verb
is to
show examples
makes
Wrong verb form
make
show examples
poeple
Correct your spelling
people
life
Use synonyms
 easier. As
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
technology
Use synonyms
increase
Change the verb form
increases
show examples
 new inventions
took
Wrong verb form
take
show examples
placed
Replace the word
place
show examples
 in
couple
Change the article
a couple
show examples
 of years,
one
Correct word choice
and one
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 of the great
invention
Change to a plural noun
inventions
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 is
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
.
Internet
Correct article usage
The Internet
show examples
help
Change the verb form
helps
show examples
 us to connect with
world
Add an article
the world
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, and gather useful information from
Add an article
the website
a website
show examples
website
Fix the agreement mistake
websites
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. Nowadays it is very difficult to imagine
life
Use synonyms
 without
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
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. It helps in every field
such
Linking Words
medical
Change preposition
as medical
show examples
, education, traveling, banking etc. In the
upcoming
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
future, AI
technology
Use synonyms
 will change the
Use synonyms
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
 of everyone. It can process any task on
her
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
 own
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and can provide
solution
Correct article usage
a solution
show examples
of
Change preposition
to
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 any problem. In conclusion,
science
Use synonyms
play
Correct subject-verb agreement
plays
show examples
 a very
curical
Correct your spelling
crucial
 role in individual
life
Use synonyms
, medical
science
Use synonyms
 helps in making
Use synonyms
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
 health better, meanwhile,
techonlogy
Correct your spelling
technology
 helps in making
people
Use synonyms
's
Use synonyms
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
 fast and easy.
Submitted by merujain2221 on

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writing
Work on sentence structure and grammar. Avoid run-on sentences and ensure verb agreement.
task response
Provide more specific examples and elaborate on them to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a logical connection between ideas. Use transition words to guide the reader through your points.
task response
Clearly states a position in the introduction supporting that science should improve people's lives.
task response
Provides examples of the positive impact of medical science and technology on people's lives.
coherence cohesion
Both an introduction and conclusion are present, clearly framing the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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