IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Task one graph shows the number of weekly hospital admissions in five hospitals in a country in europ in 2004 to 2018

Task one graph shows the number of weekly hospital admissions in five hospitals in a country in europ in 2004 to 2018
#admissions #five #hospitals #country #europ
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The graph illustrates the
number
 of hospital
admission
Fix the agreement mistake
admissions
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 on
weekly
Correct article usage
a weekly
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 basis for five different
hospitals
 in one country in
Europ
Correct your spelling
Europe
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over
Change preposition
apply
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from the year 2004 to 2018. It is notable that over the years four
hospitals
 had an increase in hospital
admissions
whereas
 Oxaly
hospital
Capitalize word
Hospital
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 experienced a significant decrease in the
number
 of admitted people. In 2004, Oxley was the hospital with the highest
number
 of patients
admission
Replace the word
admitted
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 with 250
person
Change to a plural noun
people
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 per
week
 and experienced a downward trend over the 14-year period and reached a low of 110 admonitions per
week
. Fortsmith
hospital
Capitalize word
Hospital
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 had around 180
admissions
 in the year 2004
then
 experienced some fluctuation between 2010 and 2014 before they (Time finished here)
levlled
Correct your spelling
levelled
 off at 200
admissions
 per
week
. Adlin
hospital
Capitalize word
Hospital
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had120
Correct your spelling
had 120
admission
Fix the agreement mistake
admissions
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 in 2004
then
 experienced a substantial increase in the
number
 of hospital
admission
Fix the agreement mistake
admissions
show examples
 over 14 years,
then
 soared to 250
admissions
 in 2018. The hospital
admission
Fix the agreement mistake
admissions
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 in both Bradly and Sandton
hospitals
 were 200 and 80 respectively
admissions
 per
week
. Both
hospitals
 saw a gradual rise in the
number
 of
admissions
 until they ended at 270 and 160
admissions
 in the year 2018.
Submitted by ghadeersulami on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 73%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, admission, hospitals, admissions, week with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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