In many countries people have to pay for medical care, but some think that it should be a free service provided by the government. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.
There is a
stonge
debate among Correct your spelling
strong
stone
strange
people
whether
medical Change preposition
about whether
care
should be free or not. Some individuals believe that paying for medical care
will help the government financilly
. Correct your spelling
financially
Although
both views with merit, I think basic medical care
must provided by the the
government and Remove the redundancy
apply
a
Remove the article
apply
non necessary
Add a hyphen
non-necessary
treatment
should be paid by
citizens. Change preposition
for by
However
, this
essay will discuss both arguments and mention examples.
On the one hand, healthcare
sector is one of the most costly sections in every country. Some Add an article
the healthcare
people
have a very serious medical condition but they can not afford it. As a result
, many people
died because of this
system. Moreover
, people
in the United States have to pay to get treatment
in hospitals which help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
medicall
staff get their salaries and treat patients.
Correct your spelling
medical
On the other hand
, Some government
Fix the agreement mistake
governments
such
as Middle East
governments provide Replace the word
Eastern
a
free Remove the article
apply
treatment
for their own citizens. For instance
, if a Saudi guy had
an accident, he will get free Wrong verb form
has
treatment
in a close hospital. Because of this
system, people
have insurance that they will be fine in complicated situation
. Fix the agreement mistake
situations
In addition
, this
type of healthcare system will take a huge fund by governemnts
which will cost Correct your spelling
governments
government
people
some advantages in other sectors.
To sum up
, although
medical care
cost
a significant amount of money, it is crucial to give Wrong verb form
costs
the
basic medical Correct article usage
apply
treatment
in order to save human life. So, governments must elaborate rules and policies to
the Change preposition
for
people
for basic treatment
. Nevertheless
, esthetic treatment
should be paid by
individuals since it is not related to human needs.Change preposition
for by
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coherence cohesion
Work on strengthening the logical progression of your ideas. Consider organizing your points more clearly and ensure that each paragraph discusses a single main idea. This will help improve the overall coherence of your essay.
task achievement
Enhance the clarity and depth of your arguments. Make sure your ideas are clearly expressed and well-supported by appropriate examples. This will contribute to a more comprehensive task response.
task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples to support your ideas. This will make your arguments more convincing and relevant to the task.
task achievement
The essay discusses both sides of the argument, showing an attempt to present a balanced view on whether medical care should be free.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, creating a sense of completeness and closure for the essay.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
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