In many countries people have to pay for medical care, but some think that it should be a free service provided by the government. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.

There is a
stonge
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strong
stone
strange
debate among
people
whether
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about whether
show examples
medical
care
should be free or not. Some individuals believe that paying for medical
care
will help the government
financilly
Correct your spelling
financially
.
Although
both views with merit, I think basic medical
care
must provided by the
the
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
government and
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
non necessary
Add a hyphen
non-necessary
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treatment
should be paid
by
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for by
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citizens.
However
,
this
essay will discuss both arguments and mention examples. On the one hand,
healthcare
Add an article
the healthcare
show examples
sector is one of the most costly sections in every country. Some
people
have a very serious medical condition but they can not afford it.
As a result
, many
people
died because of
this
system.
Moreover
,
people
in the United States have to pay to get
treatment
in hospitals which
help
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helps
show examples
medicall
Correct your spelling
medical
staff get their salaries and treat patients.
On the other hand
, Some
government
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governments
show examples
such
as Middle
East
Replace the word
Eastern
show examples
governments provide
a
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apply
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free
treatment
for their own citizens.
For instance
, if a Saudi guy
had
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has
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an accident, he will get free
treatment
in a close hospital. Because of
this
system,
people
have insurance that they will be fine in complicated
situation
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situations
show examples
.
In addition
,
this
type of healthcare system will take a huge fund by
governemnts
Correct your spelling
governments
government
which will cost
people
some advantages in other sectors.
To sum up
,
although
medical
care
cost
Wrong verb form
costs
show examples
a significant amount of money, it is crucial to give
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
basic medical
treatment
in order to save human life. So, governments must elaborate rules and policies
to
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for
show examples
the
people
for basic
treatment
.
Nevertheless
, esthetic
treatment
should be paid
by
Change preposition
for by
show examples
individuals since it is not related to human needs.
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coherence cohesion
Work on strengthening the logical progression of your ideas. Consider organizing your points more clearly and ensure that each paragraph discusses a single main idea. This will help improve the overall coherence of your essay.
task achievement
Enhance the clarity and depth of your arguments. Make sure your ideas are clearly expressed and well-supported by appropriate examples. This will contribute to a more comprehensive task response.
task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples to support your ideas. This will make your arguments more convincing and relevant to the task.
task achievement
The essay discusses both sides of the argument, showing an attempt to present a balanced view on whether medical care should be free.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, creating a sense of completeness and closure for the essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • universal coverage
  • equity
  • fundamental human right
  • out-of-pocket expenses
  • financial hardship
  • preventative measures
  • social contract
  • quality of care
  • high demand
  • limited resources
  • tax implications
  • budget priorities
  • universal healthcare systems
  • public health
  • disease burden
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