Throughout the history, people have dream art of living in a perfect society, but they have not agreed on what an ideal society would be like. What do you think is the most important element of a perfect society in the modern world. How can people work towards achieving an ideal society?

During all
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All
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the time,
people
are dreaming
Wrong verb form
dream
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about living in a perfect
society
which is
quiet
Correct your spelling
quite
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difficult to achieve because of
disagreement
Fix the agreement mistake
disagreements
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between different identities. In my point of view,
people
cannot agree with answering the question: "What is happiness?", because it might be the most important thing for forming a perfect
society
. It could be achieved by being honest
to
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with
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each other, but it is very hard to get for
individual
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individuals
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.
Firstly
,
perfect
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a perfect
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society
is
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relies
has relied
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relied
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relied on
relied upon
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how
people
feel inside some group of individuals. It hardly depends on happiness level represented by harmony, lack of stress and lifestyle.
People
having any stress may not fit in
society
and get worse with their mental health.
For instance
,
person
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a person
the person
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with a bad mood will have problems fitting
a
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into a
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society
, but everybody should fit in a perfect one.
This
point is
a
Correct article usage
apply
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very representative,
thus
, in cases where you move to another country for some work or studying. Despite differences in culture, you will
ealier
Correct your spelling
realise
get into
happy
Correct article usage
a happy
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community
instead
of one covered by sadness. Moving forward, being honest,
espescially
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especially
for yourself, might be very helpful for constructing a perfect
society
. Nowadays,
people
try to get higher results in different tests or get
better
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a better
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position in
community
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the community
show examples
, but
this
is a vital factor for creating
such
group
Correct article usage
a group
show examples
because there always will be decepted
people
.
Otherwise
, being honest
to
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with
show examples
each other makes individuals feel more comfortable and afford to rely
to
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on
upon
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each other easily.
Aslo
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Also
,
people
should be honest
to
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with
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themselves, it could help
to
Correct pronoun usage
them to
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achieve their goals properly.
For example
, it's
critical
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a critical
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factor to study for the exam without any cheating because high example
tests
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test
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results will not represent your score correctly and you will get lower
mark
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marks
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than you expect.
To sum up
, the idea of
perfect
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a perfect
show examples
society
might differ from person to person
while
it's
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its
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achievement may rely
to
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on
upon
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happines
Correct your spelling
happiness
inavitably
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inevitably
inevitable
.
Furthermore
, all the arguments may be caused by the variety of meanings of
this
question,
nevertheless
, understanding and reaching
happines
Correct your spelling
happiness
for everybody might be very useful for constructing an ideal community.
Submitted by i.dany24s on

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task achievement
Try to elaborate more on each element of a perfect society. Provide specific examples or case studies to support your ideas, as this will enhance your argument and make your essay more convincing.
task achievement
Work on developing your main ideas more comprehensively. Some points appear underdeveloped, and could benefit from further explanation or elaboration.
coherence cohesion
Ensure your essay is logically structured so the reader can follow your argument without confusion. Consider using transition words to link your ideas more clearly and coherently.
coherence cohesion
Be cautious of repetitive sentence structures. Vary your sentence length and structure to maintain the reader's interest and enhance readability.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which provides a good structure and frame for your argument.
task achievement
You provide relevant and specific examples, such as the impact of stress on mental health and the importance of honesty, which help illustrate your points.
task achievement
The focus on happiness and honesty as central elements of a perfect society is insightful and provides a fresh perspective on the topic.

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