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Writing Samples
Band 5

In recent years, the family structure has changed, as well as family roles. What are the changes occurring? Do you think these changes are positive or negative?

#years #structure #roles #changes
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There is no denying the fact that in the past few decades, some
changes
 regarding its organization and member roles.
While
 it is a commonly held belief that numerous
changes
 happen , there is
also
 an argument
that
Correct word choice
as
show examples
 to what extent
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
you agree or disagree with it.
This
 essay will analyse
this
 topic from both points of view and express my opinion. On one hand, the shift from traditional to modern family
structure
.
In other words
,
changes
 regarding more from extended to nuclear
families
, or even single parent.
In addition
, the transformation in the role of women- from homemaker to equal or primary breadwinner.
For example
, the changing role of fathers, taking on more caregiving responsibilities.
On the other hand
, the impact of technology on family dynamics, Including how it affects communication and shared activities. It is
also
 possible to say that it has made it easier for
families
 to stay connected across distances through video calls, messaging apps, and social media.
Moreover
, the effects of globalisation on
families
 , including how economic shifts and migration change the family
structure
 and role.
For instance
, globalisation has deeply affected on Family
structure
 and roles especially through economies become more interconnected, and many
Families
 face
changes
 in their lifestyle. In conclusion, there are no easy answers to
this
 question. On Balance,
however
, l tend to believe that in recent years, the family
structure
 has changed.
Submitted by 01_salver_cheek on

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coherence cohesion
Improve the logical flow by ensuring each paragraph clearly follows the previous one. It would help to have clear transitions between your main points and ideas.
task achievement
Include more relevant specific examples to support your points. This will help underline your arguments and make them more convincing.
task achievement
Present more comprehensive ideas about the impact of changes in family structure and roles. Discuss both positive and negative aspects in more depth.
task achievement
The essay effectively recognizes and describes a variety of changes in family structure, such as the shift from traditional to modern families and changes in gender roles, which is thoughtful and relevant.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and a conclusion, which helps frame the discussion neatly.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Family structure
  • Modern family
  • Extended family
  • Nuclear family
  • Same-sex parent families
  • Breadwinner
  • Caregiving responsibilities
  • Family dynamics
  • Globalization
  • Economic shifts
  • Migration
  • Child-free lifestyles
  • Cohabitation
  • Traditional marriage
  • Perceptions
  • Homemaker
  • Communication
  • Shared activities
What to do next:
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