IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 8

A colleague gave you a book which you used for your presentation. Write a letter to your colleague. In your letter, you should say: what the presentation was about, why the presentation was important how the book helped you.

#colleague #book #presentation
Dear John, I am writing to share the benefits I received by using the ideas from the book you gave me
last
 week. It not only helps me to boost my confidence but
also
 increases my knowledge of how to perform in a group. I never did solo presentations, but in the final semester of my bachelor's, it was mandatory to do so. I chose to give a presentation on mobile technology. I covered materials in PowerPoint slides and it was a bit easy for me to present at that time. The whole presentation was worth 30 marks in the final exam, that's why it was crucial for me to do my best. Preparing slides is easy but presenting them in front of the Dean's and Professors' are difficult.
Thus
, at
this
 point, your book assists me. It was all about how to control mind fear by doing simple exercises and I have done the same as mentioned by the writer. I want to thank you in person and look forward to hearing from you. Yours sincerely, Harpreet Kaur.
Submitted by harpreet291kaur on

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coherence and cohesion
Try to maintain a single idea per paragraph to enhance clarity and flow. For example, you could separate the explanation of the presentation's importance and how the book helped into distinct paragraphs.
coherence and cohesion
Clear and appropriate greeting and closing
task achievement
The response directly answers the prompt and provides all necessary details.
task achievement
The writing tone is friendly and appropriate for a letter to a colleague.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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