The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, the ultimate goal of science should be to enhance human lives. I completely agree with
this
assertion because of medical, technological and environmental benefits.
To begin
with, the
improvement
Fix the agreement mistake
improvements
show examples
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
medicine and technologies have
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
unprecedented results thanks to scientific research. Indeed, scientists are more likely to manage to cure terminal illnesses,
such
as cancer based on edge-cut technologies and they could achieve to eradicate dangerous diseases from the surface of the earth, resulting in analysing more deeply about human health and living conditions.
For example
, medical professors
had
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
succeeded
to prevent
Change preposition
in preventing
show examples
the proliferation of cancer cells in
patient's
Correct article usage
a patient's
show examples
body
Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
show examples
. Apart from health improvements, technological advancements alleviate the daily burdens of people. More
presicely
Correct your spelling
precisely
, gadgets and electronic appliances help to free up people's time and energy as they do not require whole attention.
For instance
, vacuum cleaners can clean not only carpets or furniture
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but air
also
since people do not have to mop the floor after vacuuming
Correct pronoun usage
their home
show examples
home
Fix the agreement mistake
homes
show examples
. Interestingly, the majority of scientific research
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
conducted to address environmental problems,
such
as climate change, resource depletion, and pollution that directly impact the well-being of current and future generations.
For example
, through improving the quality of air, water and soil, modern science can
extent
Replace the word
extend
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
human lifespans,
as well as
rescue rare species which are on the verge of extinction. In conclusion,
as a result
, science can enhance
individual's
Correct article usage
an individual's
show examples
life adding health and
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
benefits.
Submitted by kmuxayyo97 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

style
Your essay effectively addresses the topic, presenting a clear position throughout the response. To enhance your essay further, consider varying your sentence structure to add complexity and depth to your argumentation.
grammar
Make sure to proofread your essay to catch and correct minor grammatical errors and typos, such as 'more presicely' instead of 'more precisely', to ensure your essay is as polished as possible.
development
While you've provided relevant examples to support your points, further elaboration on how these examples specifically contribute to your argument could make your essay even more compelling. Adding a few sentences to explain the significance of each example will strengthen your position.
structure
You successfully used a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion that all support your thesis effectively.
content
Your essay includes a range of relevant examples that effectively support your main points, demonstrating a strong understanding of the topic.
argument
You've made a compelling argument for the importance of science in improving people's lives, covering several key areas such as health, technology, and the environment.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • technological advancements
  • medical discoveries
  • life-changing inventions
  • innovations
  • solutions to human problems
  • enhancing quality of life
  • improvement of healthcare
  • transportation
  • communication
  • agriculture
  • energy sectors
  • eradication of diseases
  • prolongation of life expectancy
  • global challenges
  • climate change
  • overpopulation
  • food security
  • developed world
  • underprivileged communities
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!