Everyone should stay in school until the age of eighteen, considering the significance of primary and secondary level education in a learner’s life. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#school #age #eighteen #significance #level #education #learner’s #life

In the contemporary era of globalization, the curriculum has witnessed a significant transformation. A wide array of individuals believe that it is crucial for the youth to terminate his primary and secondary

school

until he becomes eighteen

years

old. From my point of view, I wholeheartedly agree with

this

statement.

To begin

with,

school

years

are vital in developing youngsters.

Firstly

, they will

study

practical subjects. These subjects will assist them and make them able to cope with harsh situations.

Furthermore

, they will interact with more folks of distinct ages.

This

will reflect on their personality.

This

will make them prepared for the real world.

In other words

, they will grapple with the community with self-confidence.

According to

study

conducted by Manchester University, Individuals who ended their

school

years

are able to deal with multitasks. They are more creative and can find solutions.

However

school

years

can be a waste of time. They can struggle

while

studying

while

they are talented in another aspect. Despite understanding

this

point of view, I totally disagree with it. Education is a boon that we should exploit.

Additionally

, It will help us to maintain our knowledge and be competitive in the labour market. In his book,

School

Till Eighteen, Wayeene Rooney said that

study

is the main reason why nations are ameliorating. The institutions are seeking employees who finished all their

school

years

. In conclusion, from what has been aforementioned above,

study

is a pivotal matter. The government should help pupils to end their education

years

. It should bounce them if they get high marks,

thus

they will be motivated to learn more.

Submitted by mohannadsme on Sun Oct 20 2024

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task achievement

To enhance task response, you could integrate more specific examples or data to support your points further. For instance, mentioning specific subjects or skills learned in school could strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

Try to ensure a consistent and logical flow of ideas throughout the essay to improve coherence and cohesion. Avoid repetitive sentences and ensure each section connects clearly to the next.

coherence cohesion

The introduction provides a clear statement of your position, which is effectively revisited in the conclusion, enhancing the essay's coherence and cohesion.

task achievement

The essay covers both sides of the argument, indicating a well-rounded task response.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

270 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Everyone should stay in school until the age of eighteen, considering the significance of primary and secondary level education in a learner’s life. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that economy progress is the only way to measure a country's success, while others think that there are other factors which can be used to measure a country's success. What are these factors? Which, of all factors,do you think are most important?

Some people like to read online newspapers, on the other hand, others prefer to read paper based newspapers.Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some countries achieve international sports by building specialised facilities to train top athletes, instead of providing sports facilities that everyone can use. Do you think this is positive or negative development? Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Being a celebrity-like a famous movie star or sports figure-brings problems as well as benefits. Do you think being a celebrity brings more benefits or more problems

Some people think it is better for children to being to learn a foreign language at primary school than at secondary school. What’s your opinion? Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?