Everyone should stay in school until the age of eighteen, considering the significance of primary and secondary level education in a learner’s life. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In the contemporary era of globalization, the curriculum has witnessed a significant transformation. A wide array of individuals believe that it is crucial for the youth to terminate his primary and secondary
school
until he becomes eighteen
years
old. From my point of view, I wholeheartedly agree with
this
statement.
To begin
with,
school
years
are vital in developing youngsters.
Firstly
, they will
study
practical subjects. These subjects will assist them and make them able to cope with harsh situations.
Furthermore
, they will interact with more folks of distinct ages.
This
will reflect on their personality.
This
will make them prepared for the real world.
In other words
, they will grapple with the community with self-confidence.
According to
a
study
conducted by Manchester University, Individuals who ended their
school
years
are able to deal with multitasks. They are more creative and can find solutions.
However
,
school
years
can be a waste of time. They can struggle
while
studying
while
they are talented in another aspect. Despite understanding
this
point of view, I totally disagree with it. Education is a boon that we should exploit.
Additionally
, It will help us to maintain our knowledge and be competitive in the labour market. In his book,
School
Till Eighteen, Wayeene Rooney said that
study
is the main reason why nations are ameliorating. The institutions are seeking employees who finished all their
school
years
. In conclusion, from what has been aforementioned above,
study
is a pivotal matter. The government should help pupils to end their education
years
. It should bounce them if they get high marks,
thus
they will be motivated to learn more.
Submitted by mohannadsme on

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task achievement
To enhance task response, you could integrate more specific examples or data to support your points further. For instance, mentioning specific subjects or skills learned in school could strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Try to ensure a consistent and logical flow of ideas throughout the essay to improve coherence and cohesion. Avoid repetitive sentences and ensure each section connects clearly to the next.
coherence cohesion
The introduction provides a clear statement of your position, which is effectively revisited in the conclusion, enhancing the essay's coherence and cohesion.
task achievement
The essay covers both sides of the argument, indicating a well-rounded task response.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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