Obesity in children is a serious problem in a number of countries. What are the causes of obesity in children? Discuss the possible alarming effects of this problem in the future.
Many countries around the world witnessed an
increasing
in the number of overweight Replace the word
increase
children
, as the
Correct article usage
apply
obesity
is a major problem they face. In this
essay, I will explain the causes of obesity
in children
and what effects it can brings
.
To commence with causes, Wrong verb form
bring
the
Correct article usage
apply
obesity
comes to children
when they do not move enough movement in a day. This
usually comes from transports
they rely on and forget to walk, and Fix the agreement mistake
transport
children
do not exercise in schools or join sport
clubs. Change the noun form
sports
For instance
, nowadays, most parents depend on buses to reach
their Verb problem
get
kids
to school rather than let them walk because of the
safety. Correct article usage
apply
Moreover
, the significant issue is the fast food meals that kids
consume them
every day Correct pronoun usage
apply
instead
of eating healthy food that helps them grow.
When we talk about effects, physically, the
Correct article usage
apply
obesity
increases the risk of health issues such
as diabetes, high blood pressure and joint problems. Obese young patients can face emotional challenges, for example
, self-esteem and bullying. Additionally
, they may find it hard to practice life in some situations like practicing
physical activities with friends, they will move slowly and Change the spelling
practising
heavy
compared to others, Change the word
heavily
consequently
, they may get exhausted or even isolate themselves from people. They could also
experience academic struggles due to
low energy level
or sleeping problems .
In conclusion, the Fix the agreement mistake
levels
globe
issue of obese Replace the word
global
kids
is getting bigger year by year. The reasons are children
do not move or exercise regularly during their day and eat too much unhealthy food. The problem affects kids
mental and physical health, as it reduces their relationships.Change noun form
kids'
kid's
Submitted by danall1kat on
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task achievement
Try to further elaborate on specific examples to strengthen the connection between the causes and effects of obesity in children. Consider including more statistics or studies to provide a concrete basis for your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Work on enhancing your paragraph transitions and linking sentences to improve the overall flow and coherence of your essay. This will make your arguments connect more logically for the reader.
introduction conclusion present
The essay introduces the topic clearly, outlining the problem of childhood obesity and indicating the points you will discuss.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion effectively summarizes the key points discussed in the essay, reinforcing the importance of addressing childhood obesity.
complete response
Your essay addresses the task prompt efficiently by covering both causes and effects of childhood obesity, ensuring a clear response.
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