Pollution and other environmental damages are caused by a country developing and becoming richer. This problem cannot be avoided. To what extent do you agree?

An inevitable issue
that is
caused by developing
nations
that are becoming richer is pollution and other damages that cause harm to the
environment
. I strongly agree with
this
statement as
such
countries are increasing their
use
of oil and fossil
fuels
as well as
not contributing to actions that help improve the
environment
.
Firstly
, the
use
of oils and fossil
fuels
, which release harmful gases to the
environment
are becoming increasingly common as they are mainly used to generate electricity. Electricity is essential for homes and businesses to operate, so without it, a country cannot fully develop.
For instance
, 60% of the total global electricity generation comes from fossil
fuels
.
In addition
, as countries become more advanced, other
nations
are more likely to trade items as
such
, increasing the
use
of items that cause pollution globally.
Moreover
, most of the expenditure for a developing country goes towards its advancement.
This
results in a lack of contribution to help the
environment
.
For example
,
nations
may decide to work together to improve the
environment
,
however
, a country
that is
still developing may not be willing to spend its funds on
such
matters.
Due to
this
, environmental damages cannot be tackled globally as not all
nations
are of the same view. In conclusion, the
use
of oil and fossil
fuels
, which are essential to most countries and the reluctance to bring out funds to improve the
environment
are contributing to pollution and environmental damage.
Submitted by d.adeliasong on

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task achievement
Provide more specific examples to strengthen arguments. For instance, mention particular countries or initiatives related to fossil fuel use.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear and distinct main idea to improve clarity. This will enhance the logical structure of the essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the argument.
task achievement
The essay stays on topic and addresses the prompt directly, showcasing a complete understanding of the task.

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