Some people choose to eat no meat or fish. They believe that this is not only better for their own health but also benefits the environment as a whole. Discuss this view and give your own opinion.
These days, we can see a group of
people
are
Correct pronoun usage
who are
vegeterain
, and they do not eat Correct your spelling
vegetarian
vegetarians
meat
or fish
owing to the fact that they believe that this
method of eating have
advantages for both the environment and health. In my opinion, Change the verb form
has
this
diet have
several benefits for Change the verb form
has
environment
, but we can see Add an article
the environment
the
healthy Correct your spelling
that
people
eat a range of the
food staffs.
On the one hand, unless we eat Correct article usage
apply
meat
or fish
, we do not want to kill animals or fishing
; Replace the word
fish
besides
, we do not injured
nature Wrong verb form
injure
cyrculations
, which some Correct your spelling
circulations
circulation
animal
eat plants; Fix the agreement mistake
animals
then
wild craeture
eat prior group, and its Correct your spelling
creature
creatures
cyrcle
follow, that have a lot of influence on the environment. Correct your spelling
circle
cycle
In addition
, most people
eat damestic
animals Correct your spelling
domestic
such
as cow
, Fix the agreement mistake
cows
ship
, pork, and so on; Fix the agreement mistake
ships
additionally
, these creature
produce a lot of toxic gases that have a negative Change the determiner
creatures
eefect
on the Ozon layer.
Correct your spelling
effect
On the other hand
, we can see the population who use a range of the ingerdients
which their body Correct your spelling
ingredients
need
in their diet are really healthy Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
people
inasmuch as our budy
needs various items Correct your spelling
body
such
as different vitamins, proteins, carbohydraites
, minerals, and so forth. It is important that Correct your spelling
carbohydrates
meat
and fish
are the main sources of proteins that people
can use and a liitle
of them are good for health Correct your spelling
little
while
the people
who do not use these elemnts
have to eat a number of other foods Correct your spelling
elements
for receiving
Change preposition
to receive
this
part and some time
they are not the Replace the word
sometimes
saem
as Correct your spelling
same
meat
or fish
.
To sum up
, the fact that do not eat meat
and fish
have
a Correct subject-verb agreement
has
posetive
impact on the Correct your spelling
positive
environments
; Fix the agreement mistake
environment
nevertheless
, people
's health are more
essential; Verb problem
is
consequently
, the population have to eat not only meat
but also
fish
in their meals.Submitted by maryamkazemi968 on
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language
Work on improving grammatical accuracy and range. There are a number of minor errors in spelling and word form (e.g. 'vegeterain' should be 'vegetarian', 'budy' should be 'body', 'ship' should be 'sheep', 'eefect' should be 'effect').
relevance
Include more specific examples to support your points. Although you discuss effects on the environment and diet, more detailed examples could strengthen your argument.
structure
Clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
task achievement
The essay provides a balanced view, discussing both positive and negative aspects of a vegetarian diet.
logical structure
The main ideas are clearly presented and organized into cohesive paragraphs.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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