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Band 5

Nowadays we are producing more and more rubbish. Why do you think this is happening? What can governments do to help reduce the amount of rubbish produced?

#rubbish #governments #amount
A significant amount of waste
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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produced by individuals is a serious
problem
 these days.
However
, there are innumerable causes pertaining to it and if
it
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apply
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all
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apply
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some stringent plans are not formulated and implemented
then
 the
problem
 can even deteriorate and it can
tell
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happen
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upon
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to
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 the whole society. One of the major
acting
Correct word choice
apply
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force
Fix the agreement mistake
forces
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 behind it is that the population is increasing day by day.
Due to
this
, the demand
of
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for
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 everything like
food
 and clothes is
also
 rising which may cause of producing more garbage.
Moreover
, it is generally observed that,
nowaday's
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nowaday
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 people desire to live in modern lifestyle as they give more preference to
restaurants
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restaurant
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food
instead
 of making
food
 at home. Resultantly, restaurants use packaging products like plastic
box
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boxes
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 and bags to pack the
food
that
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apply
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increase
Wrong verb form
increasing
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 the trash in
the
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apply
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society.
Moreover
, today's era is a materialistic era where people like to
immitate
Correct your spelling
imitate
 others
such
 as famous personalities and their near and dear ones so that they can buy new things
for
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to
show examples
 show up. Under these circumstances, they decide to throw
their
Rephrase
away their
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 previous things.
In addition
,
masses
Correct article usage
the masses
show examples
 have
sedentary
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a sedentary
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 lifestyle so they do not have
quality
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the quality
a quality
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 of time to repair products . In
this
case
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case,
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 they put damaged products in the trash bin rather than fixed them.
Hence
,
this
 is
also
 the reason
of
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for
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 spreading garbage.
In contrast
, as every lock has a key,
this
problem
 can be stemmed out by the
government
. It is the duty of the
government
 they
should
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apply
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make rules and regulations for folks to use 3R
method
Fix the agreement mistake
methods
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 like reduce, reuse and recycle.
Subsequently
,
this
 obstacle can be resolved
out
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apply
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. On top of that the authorities ought to organise
awareness
Correct article usage
an awareness
show examples
 campus for people in schools and colleges
as
Correct word choice
so
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 they can
aware
Add a missing verb
be aware
show examples
about
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that
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 spreading
high
Correct article usage
a high
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 tone of waste in the public might
gives
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give
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 birth to
different
Add an article
a different
show examples
king
Correct your spelling
kind
show examples
 of diseases.
Furthermore
,
the
Correct article usage
a
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high amount of tax should be imposed by the
government
 on the goods which are purchased by
masses
Correct article usage
the masses
show examples
in
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apply
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these days. To recapitulate, it cannot be denied that
this
problem
 can be very well and effectively handled with the joint and
colleborative
Correct your spelling
collaborative
 efforts of the
government
 by imposing high taxes and strict rules and regulations.
Submitted by navdeepbajaj89 on

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task achievement
Work on providing more specific examples to support your arguments. This will help make your essay more convincing and clear.
coherence cohesion
The essay should have a more logical flow. Try using clear transition words to guide the reader through your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear central idea, and that ideas are clearly outlined and explored.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion of the essay are both well-presented, summarizing the topic and main points effectively.
task achievement
The essay covers the key points of the topic, addressing both the causes of the problem and potential solutions.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • consumerism
  • disposable culture
  • over-packaging
  • non-recyclable
  • public awareness
  • waste management
  • environmental impact
  • recycle
  • recycling facilities
  • waste separation
  • single-use products
  • infrastructure
What to do next:
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