You saw a brochure for a one-week walking tour in the mountains. You're very interested in taking part, but you're not very fit and are worried you wouldn't be able to keep up. Write to the tour operator. In your letter:
Dear Tour
operator
,
Hope Capitalize word
Operator
this
letter finds you well and you are in good health and in high spirits.I am writing this
letter to tell you that I have saw
your advertisement Change the verb form
seen
in
my phone regarding the Change preposition
on
one -week
walking tour in the mountains next week.
Well , my name is Navdeep and I am a fitness trainer by profession. So I have Correct your spelling
one-week
huge
interest Correct article usage
a huge
to do
physical activities Change preposition
in doing
such
as walking tours in mountains
.But ,sadly my left side knee got broken Correct article usage
the mountains
while
doing exercise at the gym.Therefore
,I am little
worried about my knee because climbing in the mountains Correct article usage
a little
require
a fit body and good stamina.
Change the verb form
requires
Moreover
, I want to ask you that
is there any doctor team Correct word choice
if
is
going with us. So that if I need treatment Correct pronoun usage
that is
while
climbing they can help me .Besides
this
, please tell me is
there any slot still left because my girlfriend Correct word choice
if is
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
also
want
to join me.
Looking forward to hearing from your side and if required you can call me for more information.
with regards,
NavdeepCorrect subject-verb agreement
wants
Submitted by navdeepbajaj89 on
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Coherence and Cohesion
Make sure to clearly separate different ideas into distinct paragraphs to enhance readability and logical flow.
Task Achievement
Ensure that all parts of the task, such as asking questions about the tour and expressing concerns, are fully and explicitly covered.
Task Achievement
The letter maintains a polite and respectful tone throughout, making it suitable for formal communication with the tour operator.
Coherence and Cohesion
The greeting and closing are appropriately used, enhancing the formal and friendly tone of the letter.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite