In their advertising businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negetive development?

In recent decades, the advertising industry have the access to outshine their items via technology.
Although
Correct word choice
However
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, through outstanding packaging of a product, the owners play with the psychology of consumers by noticing the behaviour
Change preposition
of customer
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customer
Fix the agreement mistake
customers
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. In my
perspectives
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perspective
show examples
, it is impacting in a
negetive
Correct your spelling
negative
way, as the product
turn
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turns
show examples
out to be really different in reality. In
further
paragraphs
Add a comma
paragraphs,
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I am going to elaborate on my views with relevant examples to support them. On one hand, promoting or advertising plays a vital role for organisations.
Moreover
, the companies hire influencers to promote their products to excel it's popularity
upon
Change preposition
among
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targeted
audience
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audiences
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.
For instance
,
an
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a
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cosmetic brand named 'sugar' in India owned by Vineta Verma, hired a
well known
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well-known
show examples
beauty icon and
youtuber
Correct your spelling
YouTuber
to exceed their beauty products
like
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by
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giving makeup
tutorial
Fix the agreement mistake
tutorials
show examples
and describing the quality and benefits of the product.
However
, after the promotion, the sugar company received an outstanding response from the audience. It clearly illustrates that showing objects in a new way will definitely come up with amazing results.
On the other hand
, the reason why I oppose the given statement, businesses advertise their ingredient by giving
a
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an
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extraordinary look, yet in
reality
Add a comma
reality,
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it is something else, a dull colour, low build quality, with
a lots
Correct the article-noun agreement
lots
a lot
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of side effects.
For example
, recently
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
Indian influencer
share
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shared
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an incident
that
Correct word choice
where
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after the advertisement, she ordered a family meal from the same platform she
do
Wrong verb form
did
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promotion
Correct article usage
the promotion
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for, in which, she found a piece of glass and hair strands.
This
incident
highlight
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highlights
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that not every advertisement is beneficial for people. In conclusion, advertising can be beneficial, when customers will get what they want and the firm will form an growing number of customers.
Nevertheless
, sometimes false advertisements can lead to the customer's worse experience for that brand and
companies
Change noun form
companies'
company's
show examples
poor
goodwil
Correct your spelling
goodwill
.
Submitted by poonam.tushir0099 on

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Grammar
Ensure consistent verb tense usage throughout your essay. For example, "advertising industry have" should be "the advertising industry has."
Clarity and Development
Clarify and expand on your ideas to avoid ambiguity. For instance, explain why the product may turn out to be different in reality to strengthen your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Improve coherence by using clearer transitional phrases between paragraphs to enhance the flow of ideas.
Task Achievement
Offer more detailed examples to support your points, ensuring they are directly relevant to the main argument.
Structure and Readability
Focus on structuring sentences for better readability, particularly in the introduction and conclusion for a more impactful essay opening and closing.
Task Achievement
The essay clearly expresses a viewpoint and draws a conclusion, adhering to the task requirements.
Examples
You use real-world examples, which demonstrate an attempt to support your arguments with evidence.
Coherence and Structure
The introduction and conclusion are present, providing a good structure to the essay.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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