Artisits need a certain amount of freedom to develop their creativity. Some people think that artisits should have total freedom to express any thoughts and ideas. To what extent di you agree or disagree

#artisits #amount #freedom #creativity #people #thoughts

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It is mentioned that liberty is a fundamental

aspects

Change the noun form

aspect

show examples

for

Use synonyms

artisits

Correct your spelling

artists

so they

could

Wrong verb form

can

show examples

express their ideas.

While

Linking Words

society

think

Change the verb form

thinks

show examples

that

this

Linking Words

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

may be true, it is essential for us to have a better understanding

about

Change preposition

show examples

this

Linking Words

point of view. To a certain degree,

Change the capitalization

show examples

agree as total freedom enables the

Use synonyms

artisits

Correct your spelling

artists

to have better

imagination

Fix the agreement mistake

imaginations

show examples

and explore the

art

Use synonyms

world.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, it might not be beneficial if the

Use synonyms

artisits

Correct your spelling

artists

were not realistic and

Wrong verb form

did

show examples

not comprehend what

are

Wrong verb form

was

show examples

being asked

from

Change preposition

show examples

them. To produce an exceptional

art

Use synonyms

piece,

Artisit

Correct your spelling

artists

require their own time and space so they have some room

Change preposition

for

show examples

thinking to develop the product, which can bring new light to the people.

For example

Linking Words

, La Sagrada Familia in Barcelona is still currently under construction process

due to

Linking Words

its complexity, yet people still consider it as one of the most beautiful

building

Change to a plural noun

buildings

show examples

in the world.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, by having an opportunity to explore the

art

Use synonyms

scenery,

Use synonyms

artisits

Correct your spelling

artists

can showcase some of their masterpieces to the public. By expanding the horizon of

Use synonyms

art

Add an article

the art

show examples

world, society can grow in terms of innovative thinking,

this

Linking Words

innovative thinking

then

Linking Words

can be applied in many other aspects, technology

for example

Linking Words

On the other hand

Linking Words

Use synonyms

artisits

Correct your spelling

artists

need to be realistic as the resources that they have may not be able to create something that they have imagined. The artist may imagine

to create

Change the verb form

creating

show examples

a picture of

forest

Correct article usage

a forest

show examples

, but when they

lacked

Wrong verb form

lack

show examples

the colour green, the image generated may not be the same as their initial perspective.

In addition

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

profession usually

required

Wrong verb form

requires

show examples

sponsors to support them. it is unfortunate that on many occasions the

Use synonyms

artisits

Correct your spelling

artists

have

different

Add an article

a different

show examples

point

Fix the agreement mistake

points

show examples

of view

with

Change preposition

from

show examples

their clients, and if they do not get what they

wanted

Wrong verb form

want

show examples

, these

Use synonyms

artisits'

Correct your spelling

artists'

business may not be sustained as their customers will use the service from another artist. To summarize, it is necessary for

Use synonyms

artisits

Correct your spelling

artists

to have their own freedom as it could bring out their creative and exploration sides. Meanwhile, we

also

Linking Words

have to remember that in order for the artist to create a remarkable product, we have to remind them

that

Linking Words

Correct your spelling

show examples

is important for them to be realistic and comprehend what are the needs

from

Change preposition

show examples

their clients.

Submitted by auliahakim0001 on Thu Oct 24 2024

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coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps maintain a coherent structure. However, the main points could be more clearly organized to enhance logical flow. Consider using topic sentences and linking words more effectively to connect paragraphs.

task achievement

While the response answers the question and provides a balanced view, some points could be more clearly developed. Try elaborating on your supporting arguments with further details or examples.

task achievement

Ensure that each argument is well-supported with specific examples or evidence to improve clarity and comprehension of ideas.

coherence cohesion

The introduction sets the context of the essay effectively, and the conclusion provides a satisfactory summary.

task achievement

Relevant examples are provided to support arguments, such as the mention of La Sagrada Familia, which strengthens the main points.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
32
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

370 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

freedom of expression
censorship
innovation
creativity
thought-provoking
societal progress
controversial topics
ethical considerations
hate speech
incitement to violence
public opinion
artistic boundaries
cultural impact
historical context
revolutionary art

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Artisits need a certain amount of freedom to develop their creativity. Some people think that artisits should have total freedom to express any thoughts and ideas. To what extent di you agree or disagree

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

The internet has greatly increased our access to information. To what extent do you think this is a good thing? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experienc

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Differing amount of nitrogen oxide by four types of vehicles.

In a public-funded healthcare system, people who are willing to pay for the best and fast treatment should be able to do so. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Museums and art gallaries should concentrate on works that show histroy and culture of their own country rather than works of the other parts in the world. To what extent to do you agree or disagree?