Should parents be obliged to immunise their children against common childhood diseases? Or do individuals have the right to choose not to immunise their children?
Vaccinations help stop
children
from getting sick and prevent dangerous diseases from spreading. There is debate about weather
Correct your spelling
whether
parents
should be forced to vaccinate their children
if they should have a choice
. I believe parents
should be required to vaccinate their children
to protect public health.
First and foremost, one reason vaccination
should be required is that it protects everyone in the community. This
is because vaccination
stops diseases from spreading. If most people
get vaccinated, it helps protect others who are not able to be vaccinated, like people
with weak immune systems. Additionally
, the disease can come back if people
avoid getting vaccines. For example
, diseases like COVID-19 are reappearing and not enough people
get vaccinated, which is dangerous for everyone.
Secondly
, another reason is that vaccination
is a shared responsibility for society. Public health is more important than personal choice
. Moreover
, while
people
have rights, those rights should not put others at risk due to
vaccination
helps to protect everyone. However
, the government intervention is necessary to ensure safety. For instance
, seatbelt laws that help hundreds of lives from accidents, and vaccination
mandates protect the public from harm. If left entirely to personal choice
, the risks could lead to widespread outbreaks and increased healthcare costs.
In conclusion, ensuring children
are vaccinated is a crucial responsibility for both parents
and society. While
some argue for individual freedom, the risks of not vaccinating children
far outweigh the benefits of personal choice
. In my view, the protection of public health should be taken seriously, and parents
should be legally required to immunise their children
.Submitted by anggiagni on
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task achievement
Ensure to address all parts of the task thoroughly. For example, you could discuss more about the individual's right or why some parents might choose not to vaccinate their children.
task achievement
Try to provide more examples or evidence to support your points. This will make your arguments more convincing and demonstrate a thorough understanding.
coherence and cohesion
Make use of clear paragraphs for each main idea. This enhances readability and makes it easier to follow your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Be careful with some words, for instance, the spelling of 'weather' should be 'whether.' Though minor, ensuring accuracy helps maintain clarity.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame the argument nicely.
task achievement
You provide a strong argument for mandatory vaccination by focusing on public health benefits and shared societal responsibility.
task achievement
Using relevant, relatable examples like COVID-19 and seatbelt laws strengthens your argument and adds depth to your essay.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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