Write about the following topic: Some people think that competition at work,at school and in daily life is agood thing.Others believe that we should try to cooperate more,rather thancompeting against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your ownknowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.
The argument over whether
people
should compete or cooperate more with others in their daily life
has not been settled yet. Fix the agreement mistake
lives
Whereas
competiton
offers a great chance to improve Correct your spelling
competition
people
's ability about
Change preposition
to
problem-solving
or creative Correct your spelling
problem-solve
mind
, cooperation Fix the agreement mistake
minds
have
a kind working environment and Verb problem
creates
avoid
lots of conflicts. Correct subject-verb agreement
avoids
Utimately
, I think the Correct your spelling
Ultimately
competition
will be a good choice in long-term consideration.There are several advantages for people
trying to cooperate more.
Cooperation can provide a harmony
environment Replace the word
harmonious
to
everyone in the company, which can reduce the Change preposition
for
working-stress
and make Correct your spelling
working stress
people
working
more efficiently.Because, if Wrong verb form
work
people
feel relaxed and delightful, their mind
Fix the agreement mistake
minds
would
be more active. Wrong verb form
will
That is
to say, people
will think more quickly and more creative
.What's more cooperative Change the word
creatively
people
behave to work
more in a team rather than working individually, which is vital for teamwork.
On the other hand
, selecting being competitive at work
also
offers advantages for people
. Firstly
, competitive people
may have a better working career,such
as higher positions and greater income.Because, these people
are more likely to be noticed by their leader and to be able to play an important role in work
,which means they could have a platform to show their abilities. In contrast
, without being competitive, people
may spent
most of their lives working in obscurity and gain less success.Change the verb form
spend
Competition
at work
will help people
to learn new skills, especially in working places,it is hard to learn things without motivatition
, so Correct your spelling
motivation
competition
offers such
motivation to everyone who want
to be the winner,which helps them to learn skills.
In conclusion,Change the verb form
wants
although
working cooperatively will give you a comfortable working area, it is easy to addicted to it, when
you Correct word choice
and when
were
out of that situation, being abandoned will be Wrong verb form
are
you
destiny. Living in Change the pronoun
your
such
a competitive world, it is hard to survive from competition
, so both for personal and company, it will be better to choose competiton
as a selection.Correct your spelling
competition
Submitted by chen.allen0912 on
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coherence cohesion
Work on improving the logical flow of your ideas. Sometimes, your points feel a bit disconnected. Use more transition words or phrases to guide the reader through your thoughts.
task achievement
Try to include more specific examples to support your points. This will help to illustrate your arguments more effectively and make them more relatable.
task achievement
Ensure you address both sides of the argument equally before giving your opinion, as this will demonstrate a balanced discussion.
coherence cohesion
You provide a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your discussion nicely.
task achievement
You discuss both the benefits of cooperation and competition, showing a balanced view and understanding of the topic.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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