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Band 5.5

There have been more and more traffic issues in cities. One of the best ways to solve this problem is to set the city fee for those who drive onto some specific congested roads. Do you agree or disagree?

#traffic #cities #city #fee #drive #roads
In the fast-paced world,
traffic
 congestion has become a major problem in town areas. Most people suggest that one solution to overcome
this
 issue is to charge driving
fees
.
This
 strategy may not be the best way as it can lead to negative results and there are other effective solutions. One reason to prove that driving
fees
 do not sustainably solve
road
 issues is that
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 can affect individuals who need to use personal vehicles
due to
 their daily activities located in limited areas to access public transportation. When the city implements
this
 method, it may cause disappointment and dissatisfaction among residents.
For instance
, the India land transportation department reported that
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 number of complaints from
road
 users sharply
increases
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 when applied
fees
 for the high
traffic
 demand routes.
Additionally
, people argued that
road
 infrastructure and
traffic
 mobility are not improved compared to
high
Correct article usage
the high
show examples
 revenue acquired from
fees
.
Moreover
,
instead
 of charging
fees
, the governments should examine the other practicable options by developing, expanding, and
well-maintaining
Correct your spelling
maintaining
show examples
 comprehensive public transport systems
such
 as a local bus route, bike lanes, and pedestrian
walkway
Fix the agreement mistake
walkways
show examples
. Those approaches can encourage individuals to leave their cars at home, resulting in
dramatically
Replace the word
a dramatic
show examples
 decrease
road
Change preposition
in road
show examples
traffic
.
For example
,
according to
 Canada
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 launched the programs claiming that 98% of
traffic
 jams have been reduced.
In addition
, utilizing smart
traffic
 light technologies that significantly manage
traffic
 flow aligned with
road
 demand will eliminate
traffic
 flow rate problems. All in all, the long-lasting way to take over
traffic
 issues in cities should focus on benefits for citizens.
While
 setting the
fees
 will have unintended consequences, executing transportation infrastructure and technology can lead to positive outcomes.
Submitted by amittawin on

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Example
Provide more specific examples from different contexts or cities to strengthen the argument.
Explanation
Clarify the potential negative consequences of setting driving fees and expand on why they might occur.
Coherence
Ensure each paragraph clearly links to the next to enhance the flow of ideas.
Introduction/Conclusion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the argument.
Language
Good variety of sentence structures and vocabulary.
Argumentation
Addresses both sides of the argument, offering alternative solutions effectively.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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