In many developed and developing nation, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could help to tackle that issue.

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Nowadays, median life
expectency
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expectancy
in many countries is growing.
This
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cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
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more old
people
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occupying
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to occupy
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job vacancies
instead
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of
youth
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.
Also
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, older individuals who do not
work
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would bring about excessive financial pressure on
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
and
societies
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society
show examples
. One of the crises of
this
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phenomenon is more of the old
people
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would
work
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in some professions in their old age.
Thus
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, there might not
find
Verb problem
be
show examples
any spaces for young
people
Use synonyms
in job markets.
Due to
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the fact that
youth
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are more energetic and
hardworker
Correct your spelling
hardworking
hard worker
,
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
of
work
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for the
youth
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would result in
unproductiveness
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the unproductiveness
show examples
of businesses. For
instanse
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instance
, some doctors
who
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apply
show examples
work
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untill
Correct your spelling
until
their old age and
this
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might be
chalenging
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challenging
for a young doctor to get their place.
Furthermore
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, an increase in the population of the old
people
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in the nations
require
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requires
show examples
more
health
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care services and financial
supports
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support
show examples
.
For example
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, some
Governments
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provide free
health
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care services for their senior citizens
such
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as free
montly
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monthly
chechups
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checkups
.
Also
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, the
athorities
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authorities
devote considerable money to
the
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apply
show examples
pension
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. To
tacke
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address
the problem of job
vacancy
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vacancies
show examples
, the
governments
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could pass a law which
companis
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companies
and businesses should prioritize recruiting
the
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apply
show examples
young
people
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insted
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instead
of
the
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apply
show examples
elder
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older
show examples
ones.
For example
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, hospitals could consider
to
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working
show examples
work
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with younger doctors in order to give them
opportunity
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the opportunity
an opportunity
show examples
to illustrate their capabilities. To
adress
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address
the issue of excessive
health
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and financial support of the elderly.
Instead
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of the
governments
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being in charge of paying
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pension
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pensions
show examples
and providing
health
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insurances
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insurance
show examples
,
priivate
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private
institutions could be established.
As a result
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of
this
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,
people
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pay for their insurance and
pension
Use synonyms
during their lives and when get old, they can use its
health
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and
finance
Replace the word
financial
show examples
benefits. In conclusion, life expectancy causes several problems in the societies. These would be solved with
aid
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the aid
show examples
of the
governments
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in
pass
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passing
show examples
the law for prioritizing
youth
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in recruitment processes.
Also
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, private
organization
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organizations
show examples
for
pension
Use synonyms
and insurance could mitigate the issues.
Submitted by rezaei.rezvan94 on

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task achievement
The essay addresses the topic, but it could benefit from more detailed analysis of the problems and solutions. Make sure to expand on how these problems specifically impact both individuals and society.
task achievement
Ensure that each paragraph contains a clear main idea, and try to develop these ideas with more concrete examples. For instance, when discussing healthcare costs, explain how this directly affects government budgets.
coherence cohesion
The essay's structure is logical, but transitions between paragraphs and ideas could be smoother. To improve coherence, use linking words and phrases to connect ideas more clearly.
coherence cohesion
Include a more detailed conclusion that summarizes the main points and reinforces your arguments. This will help strengthen the overall cohesion of the essay.
task achievement
The essay clearly identifies two main problems associated with increased life expectancy, which shows an understanding of the task requirements.
task achievement
Some relevant examples are provided, such as the impact on job vacancies and the need for healthcare, which illustrate the points being made.
coherence cohesion
There is a clear introduction and conclusion present, which helps to organize the essay effectively.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • average life expectancy
  • healthcare systems
  • overcrowded
  • strained
  • retirement age
  • pension systems
  • workforce imbalances
  • social isolation
  • housing shortages
  • lifelong learning
  • affordable housing
  • developing nation
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