IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some species of animals are almost extinct; and many others seem to be fast approaching a similar risk. What are the reasons for this? What should be done to solve this problem?

#species #animals #risk
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The numbers of
animals
Use synonyms
 are
dcreasing
Correct your spelling
decreasing
increasing
 day by day and most of the species are already in the condition of extinct. In the following essays, I will describe the reasons behind the extinction of
animals
Use synonyms
 and ways to solve
this
Linking Words
 issue.The biggest reason for decreasing numbers of
animal
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animals
show examples
 is natural
decaying
Replace the word
decay
show examples
.
Due to
Linking Words
over population
Correct your spelling
overpopulation
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, nature is being distorted as more living spaces are needed for human beings.
For instance
Linking Words
, in Bangladesh forestry has been cut off to make
rail way
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railways
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 through the jungle.
As a result
Linking Words
, elephants and other species are
under
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in
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 danger. Another reason is climate change and because of
this
Linking Words
 biodiversity is being abnormal. Changing weather is causing unbearable living for
animals
Use synonyms
. Most of the greeneries are being
deminished
Correct your spelling
diminished
 rapidly resulting in losses of animal lives. To solve
this
Linking Words
 issue, it is a necessity to take steps like reinforcing the laws for
environment
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environmental
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 protection
as well as
Linking Words
 social awareness. There should be protocols
on
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for
show examples
 environmental
usages
Fix the agreement mistake
usage
show examples
. People should be aware of the present situation and make some campaigns to influence others. In fact, measurements should be taken through global stages since it is a global issue now.In conclusion, it can be noted from the above description that the main causes of the extinction of
animals
Use synonyms
 are
change
Fix the agreement mistake
changes
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 nature and climate. To cope
up
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apply
show examples
with
this
Linking Words
, people
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 all ages and stages should come forward and join
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
hands. It is high time we took steps to prevent natural losses by implementing laws on
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
show examples
.
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task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples in your argument to strengthen your essay. For example, you can mention specific species affected by deforestation or climate change.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your ideas are clearly articulated. A stronger link between different paragraphs and points would enhance the clarity of your essay.
task achievement
The essay addresses the main points of the task, discussing both the reasons for animal extinction and possible solutions.
coherence cohesion
A clear introduction and conclusion frame your discussion, guiding the reader through your arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • species extinction
  • endangered animals
  • biodiversity
  • habitat loss
  • deforestation
  • urbanization
  • poaching
  • illegal wildlife trade
  • climate change
  • pollution
  • conservation efforts
  • legislation
  • enforcement
  • human overpopulation
  • sustainable development
  • responsible consumption
  • education
  • awareness programs
  • protected areas
  • wildlife reserves
  • international cooperation
  • collaboration
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