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Writing Samples
Band 8.5

The line graph and pie chart below show information on crime in the UK for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph and pie chart below show information on crime in the UK for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The two diagrams present data regarding criminal activity in the United Kingdom during the past year. Specifically, the line chart demonstrates the amount of criminal acts
according to
Linking Words
age
Use synonyms
,
whereas
Linking Words
 the pie chart represents a distribution of various types of crimes. On the whole, it can be inferred that violent offences dominate, comprising nearly half of all incidents
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and that younger individuals are disproportionately involved in criminal acts. Notably, criminal behaviour commenced yearly, following the
age
Use synonyms
 of 8, after which crime rates increased sharply. The number of illegal actions escalated significantly with
age
Use synonyms
 culminating in a peak of 80,000 crimes committed by those aged 20.
Subsequently
Linking Words
, the figure declined by 75% by
age
Use synonyms
 28,
thereafter
Linking Words
 decreasing gradually. At 60, the crime rate was fewer than 10,000 incidents. In terms of unlawful activity types, nearly fifty per cent were violent offences,
while
Linking Words
 theft and robbery, alongside drug trafficking, accounted for 23% and 22%, respectively. Merely 9% constituted public order offences.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words age with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • The line graph depicts
  • The pie chart illustrates
  • reveals
  • displays
  • depicts
  • the trend of
  • the overall crime rate
  • steadily decreased
  • the distribution of
  • different types of crime
  • prevalent
  • accounts for
  • the most common crime
  • followed by
  • make up
  • a smaller proportion of
  • the total crimes
  • a smaller percentage
  • approximately
  • the remaining percentage
  • It is important to note that
  • reflects
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