In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city. Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

Nowadays teenagers are becoming more independent and have the tendency to outgrow and strive to flourish. Recent years have shown a significant debate over whether youngsters
shall
Verb problem
should
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study abroad, I strongly agree with
this
view, because they will become more independent and will help them in future with any working conditions. First and Foremost, Studying abroad develops strong characterized individuals, by exposing them to different living conditions from living alone to having a roommate which unlikely to match each other’s
characters
Replace the word
characteristics
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to even cooking alone, all these uncomfortable surroundings
helps
Correct subject-verb agreement
help
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the students to be more self-standing .I recall when I studied in Norway
while
my parents were living in Egypt, I
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
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learned a lot from
this
experience by enjoying
to take
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taking
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on challenges solely, I always remember how I am proud of going through every step alone and how I managed to build up a lot of good habits.
Additionally
, being alone in a new country teaches you to appreciate your own company
to
Correct word choice
and to
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enjoy studying, walking, reading and cooking alone. I used to wonder if I found someone doing something by himself if he/she is
enjoying
Correct pronoun usage
enjoying it
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, but after going through the same experience, by far that was the best habit I picked up. I cherished every milestone I did and when I started working I had
self awareness
Add a hyphen
self-awareness
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of what exactly I
want
Wrong verb form
wanted
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to reach or achieve.
To sum up
, students
shall
Verb problem
should
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be motivated to study in
a different countries
Correct the article-noun agreement
different countries
a different country
show examples
it will help them gain new decent habits and will support them to prosper differently,
moreover
to tackle any issues that may arise strongly and independently.
Submitted by Mido  on

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coherence cohesion
Work on the introduction to more clearly outline the main arguments and provide a stronger thesis statement.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph clearly supports the topic sentence and transitions smoothly to the next.
task achievement
Provide a more nuanced discussion of both sides of the argument to enhance task achievement.
task achievement
The essay provides personal examples that effectively illustrate the main points.
coherence cohesion
There is a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task achievement
The language used is clear and concise, making it easy for the reader to understand your points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • independence
  • self-reliance
  • finance management
  • exposure
  • broaden horizons
  • open-minded
  • adaptability
  • conducive environment
  • isolation
  • homesickness
  • financial burden
  • household duties
  • academic responsibilities
  • personal growth
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