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Band 5

The qualities of a person to be successful in a real world cannot be learned from a university or similar academic institution.

#qualities #person #world #university #institution
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The discussion about whether or not the characteristics
to be
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of
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 a successful individual can be learned from a university or similar institution is a very controversial one. There are
people
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 on both sides of the argument who have very strong feelings. There are a number of good reasons why
people
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 think that the qualities can be learned from
the
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apply
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academic institutions like universities. First of all, it is an unannounced rule of both the corporate world and the social world that a man's acquisition of academic
qualifications
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 is a giant reflector towards
success
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 in every wall of life. These essentials for
success
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 cannot be learned without professional
help-in
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help in
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 schools
and
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apply
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colleges or universities.
Furthermore
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, A few exceptions cannot be taken as a general rule. If you look at a global directory of successful
people
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 you might find a few hundred like Bill Gates, but you will find millions of doctors, engineers, IT professionals, lawyers, and advocates who rely upon their formal education. Even Bill Gates
has
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would
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 not
prospered
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have prospered
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 without the skills of these IT professionals and engineers
Moreover
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,
success
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 is about making the most of your talents and abilities, and that requires dedication and study in academic institutions that will stretch you intellectually There are,
however
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, many
people
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 who have
absolute
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the absolute
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 opposite idea regarding the topic.
Firstly
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,
Success
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 never depends upon grades. If
success
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 and opportunities were measured by grades
then
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 the corporate world would not ask for
bio data
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biodata
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 in résumés, where other
qualifications
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 are
also
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 mentioned.
Secondly
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, the rule of
success
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 is hard work and destiny of course. If a student of engineering gets good grades but
he
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apply
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is not practically effective in
relationship-buildings
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relationship-building
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 and solving crises or proper planning. even though he may be successful in getting a job
but
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apply
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it will not lead him far.
Moreover
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,
success
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 does not depend upon academic
qualifications
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 but upon opportunities provided by entrepreneurs who may not
be
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apply
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necessarily be highly educated.
In addition
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, Successful entrepreneurs even benefit from not having academic
qualifications
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, because going to college and taking examinations forces
people
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 to learn and think like millions of other graduates. In conclusion, I would like to state that I am in favour
of
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or
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 against the statement. I think what I have stated in
this
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 essay emphasizes
this
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 point and requires no more discussion.
Submitted by nazmulrafi023 on

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Task Achievement
Your essay covers different points of view about whether success can be learned in academic institutions, which is great. However, it would be beneficial to make your stance clearer in the conclusion. Consider clearly restating your position or combining your arguments to form a unified stance.
Coherence and Cohesion
Improve coherence by organizing your essay in a smoother flow. You might consider using more transitional phrases to guide the reader through your argument seamlessly. Additionally, be consistent with your references to examples such as the mention of Bill Gates. This will amplify your key points.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your introduction sets the scene well by acknowledging the controversy; this is a strong start.
Task Achievement
You distinguish well between the views of those who support and those who oppose the assertion that success qualities are learned in universities.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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